fake love ♧ kim seokjin au

fake love ; eight - tears

Pagkauwi ko sa bahay ay agad naman akong sinalubong ng amoy na masarap. Hindi marunong magluto si Manager Kim. Who is this? Hindi naman siguro si Jin or Jongsuk?

Ibinaba ko yung shades ko sa coffee table sa harapan ng couch, at agad na tumakbo papunta sa kwarto ko sa taas.

As I ran past the other doors, nakita ko na ang pinto ko and opened it. Pagkapasok ko naman ay isinara ko na agad and locked it, tapos ay tinignan agad ang mga mata ko sa salamin. Namamaga. Nanaman.

I looked like a mess. Namamaga ang mga mata ko and my face was namumula. Hindi ko alam kung anong magiging reaksyon ko. I just wanted to cry again and just sulk for today dahil walang masayang kaganapan sa tuwing araw na to.

Dahan dahan naman ay kumuha ako ng pajamas from my emergency cabinet na pinaglalagyan ko ng pajamas ko. Mahirap kasi na pajamas nalang, tapos nasa walk in closet pa. Yung pajamas naman na nakuha ko ay yung white and baby pink na unicorn onesie ko, and I was too lazy to pick another one kaya ay kinuha ko nalang yun and underwear, tapos ay nagpunta na sa attached na bathroom ko dito.

When I closed the door, ipinatong ko naman yung change of clothes ko sa may maliit na table dito na patungan ko talaga ng damit and went to the bathtub na binuksan ko yung faucet. Mabilis naman ang pagtaas ng tubig kaya mabilis lang din ang paghihintay ko.

Namili naman ako ng isa sa mga bath bombs ko and chose the unicorn poop bath bomb, with the rainbow colour and sprinkle like design. I smiled softly, and then looked at the bathtub. Puno na, kaya naman ay pinatay ko na yung faucet and then stripped off of my clothes. I then dropped the bathbomb, and waited for it.

Nang matapos na ako sa pagligo at sa pagbihis ay agad naman na sinuot ko yung indoor slippers ko na fluffy baby pink. Bumaba naman na ako sa may living room, after taking my phone, and wondered who the hell of my friends were inside my home.

Pagdating ko naman sa baba ay nasa kitchen pa din yung amoy and the sound of something frying ay naririnig pa din. Kaya naman, naisipan ko na sa kitchen nalang dumiretso para naman malaman ko kung sino ba yung nandito.

When I reached the kitchen, however, ay nakita ko naman si Jin, wearing the baby pink apron na isa sa mga collection ko dito, and he was wearing blue mittens. He honestly looks so wife material right now, despite the fact na lalaki siya.

"Jin? Bakit ka nandito?" I asked, and then his gaze fell on me.

Nakangiti siya, kaso nang nagtama ang mga paningin namin ay napakunot naman yung mga kilay niya and approached me.

"Manager Kim told me that you needed someone to accompany you, so here I am. Bakit ka umiiyak? Isa pa, you look cute in your onesie," sabi ni Jin, and I looked away.

Nahihiya ako sa suot ko. Para akong isip bata. Umiling naman ako, and he did nothing.

"Alam ko hindi pa tayo close, but since  this plan of brewing fake love is gonna go on for god knows how long, is it alright if I try to get closer to you? After all, I wanted to be friends with you. Hindi naman siguro masama kung gusto kitang maging kaibigan, di ba? I want to be your friend because despite the happy and cheerful Nation's Crown Princess image you have, I see it in your eyes that you're in pain," Sabi niya, seryoso, and I looked up at him.

How the hell did he know that I was in pain? No one ever noticed. No one ever noticed that before, and I am surprised that he did. Isa pa, hindi pa naman kami nagsama sa isang project that requires closeness unlike Jongsuk, kaya naman ay nakapagtataka kung paano niya nalaman na deep inside this girl is a sad woman?

"I'm not in pain, Jin. I'm happy," pagsabi ko, and he sighed, tapos ay hinawakan niya ang shoulders ko and faced me to him.

I looked up at his eyes, and they were showing genuine worry. Ipinapakita ng mga mata niya sa akin na nag-aalala siya at totoo ang nararamdaman niya na yun. Pero bakit? Ano bang meron kung malungkot ako? Bakit siya magkakaroon ng pakialam, e nagkakilala lang naman kami at nag-usap dahil sa pag-DM ko sa kanya?

Bakit? Bakit? Bakit?

"Hanjin. You don't need to lie to me. I can see through it. You just have to trust me," sabi niya, and I shook my head immediately.

"No, Jin. I don't want to trust you. I don't. The last time I trusted someone, they died. Namatay siya, Jin. Namatay siya." Sabi ko, and the tears came rushing down my cheeks again.

Agad naman niyang pinatay yung niluluto niya sa stove, and then pulled me into a hug. Nagpatuloy lang yung mga luha ko sa pagbagsak, but the way he hugged me comforted me for some reason. Hindi ko na inisip na mukha akong isip bata o mukha akong tanga dahil sa suot ko, dahil si Jin lang naman to. Kaming dalawa lang yung nandito.

"Shh, a pretty face like yours doesn't deserve to be stained by tears," he whispered, and then pulled away from the hug para mapunasan ang mga luha ko using his thumbs.

Parang bata na umiiyak, hinayaan ko siya na punasan ang mga luha ko at iniiyak ko nanaman ang lahat. Siguro kapag iniiyak ko na lahat, mawawala na yung sakit, no? Mawawala na siguro yung sakit na nararamdaman ko, kasi nailabas ko na lahat?

"J-Jin, bakit ako?" I asked, and gripped his shirt, tapos ay nag sigh siya and caressed my head habang ipinatong ito sa shoulder niya.

"We don't know, Hanjin. Hindi natin alam bakit ikaw ang pinahihirapan ng kalungkutan. Pero malakas ka, di ba? You've fought this war for years," sabi ni Jin, and I hugged him tight.

Hindi ko na rin alam kung bakit umiiyak pa ako ngayon, but I was. Halos hindi na ako makahinga dahil sa pag iyak, pero hindi naman humihiwalay si Jin sa pagyakap. In fact, he was caressing my head and is whispering soft nothings into my ear kahit na hindi ko sabihin sa kanya ang buong kwento ng araw na to.

"Do you wanna watch a movie? Let's eat, too. I cooked food. I wanted to be the one to make you feel better," sabi niya, and then I pulled away from the hug and nodded.

"I'm sorry for crying in front of you. Sorry kung nadala ako ng emosyon ko. It's his death anniversary. Today." I said, and I was surprised that I told him.

I never told anyone this, kahit na kay Jongsuk. Hindi ko sinasabi na umiiyak ako sa tuwing death anniversary niya. Hindi niya alam. Kahit yung Bad Valentine, ngayon nalang kami ulit nagkita after ilang years, kaya naman nagtataka ako.

Why did I open up? Bakit kay Jin?

Temporary lang naman yung kay Jin, di ba? Kasi aalis din siya, and aalis din ako?

Of all people, bakit si Jin?

"Don't blame yourself. It's not your fault that you are hurt. Lahat ng tao ay nasasaktan." Sabi ni Jin, and I slowly nodded.

"I guess?" Sabi ko, and then he looked at me straight in the eye.

"Do you wanna hear a joke?" He asked, grinning now, and I tilted my head sidewards. Ano nanamang joke to?

"What joke? Spill," I said, and his grin widened.

"What did the patient say when the doctor apologized for being late?" Tanong ni Jin, and I tilted my head in confusion.

"What...?" I asked, and then he grinned wider.

"Don't worry, I'm patient," He said, and I bit my lip to stop myself from laughing, kaso nga lang ay I bursted into fits of laughter already as he laughed along with me.

"Your jokes are... Lejindary," I said, and then he laughed at pumalakpak pa causing me to grin.

"Hey, did you hear about the kidnapping?" He asked, at seryoso na siya ngayon kaya naman ay napakunot ako at nagtaka. Anong kidnapping? Sa balita?

"Huh? Where?" I asked, and then his face was so red as he was trying hard not to laugh kaya naman ay natatawa na ako sa hitsura pa lang niya.

"Don't worry, he woke up," sagot niya, and I laughed as I slapped his arm.

"Benta ka ha," sabi ko, and he laughed and shook his head while wiping his tears from laughing.

"Sayo lang benta yang mga yan," sabi niya, and I chuckled.

"Why?" I asked, and nagchuckle naman siya.

"Kasi lagi kong pinauulanan sina Jungkook ng jokes ko," sabi niya, and I laughed.

This guy made me laugh and cry at the same time. Maybe, just maybe, I can trust him.

But it was fake love, and there's nothing permanent in it.