DADDY ISSUES

31

The next day finds me on the floor gazing out the window. I see the sun go down and I see it raising. Tears to my eyes and guilt is all I feel. I know I'm wrong, I know what I feel is bad but I can't help myself. I can't. And there is no way of stopping it. We can't decide who we will fall for. No one has ever rule feelings. When you feel you feel. Even if the person you want is the worst. And I'm not trying to find excuses to myself. I know what I feel and I know what I did. I'm always so close to the fire. To the only thing, im hoping is that to this month I will be a way of him I will manage to forget him. I have too.

 I close my eyes. Why did he have to be with my mom? But if he wasn't I will never have the chance to meet him, know him. But it could be better. Right? I stand up finally. I take clean clothes and go to the bathroom. I need to take a shower. I didn't get one yesterday and I dive in the ocean. The salt will start to itch. 

I get undressed and I open the shower. I allow the water to take all my stress, pain, worried and tiredness away. I spend an hour under the shower doing nothing, just standing there. But I get out before I finish all the warm water. I wrap a towel around my body. I go back to my room and sit on the bed facing the window. I breathe in, breathe out. Nothing was in my mind, it was just empty. The water took away everything. 

But I have this pain to my head and throat and chest but I couldn't explain why. Maybe a pain killer will help. I put some short and t-shirt on and go to the kitchen. My hair was still wet from the shower I take. I drink up the pill with a little water. I go to the window that the living room had. The light brize makes me shiver. I hug myself. I hear footsteps and someone stands in front of me.

" What are you doing wake that early? "

He asks. I didn't even look at his face. 

" Nothing "

I say coldly and I walk to my room. He was again swimming in the pool. I see it from the corner of my eye drying his body with his towel. I lay my body to the bed and watch the ceiling. I sit there for hours. Until mom storm in my room and scare me and I jump up to the bed. My heart was beating so fast. She laughs.

" Did I scare you? "

She asked as she sits on my bed. I look at her.

" Yeah "

" Sorry "

She says as she laughs. 

" So tonight we are gonna go to eat out to a nice restaurant. "

" That's nice "

I say and I lay back. 

" You gonna come as well and be dresses well "

She spits out just like this and walks out before I could say something to her.  I let a breath annoyed, knowing that I couldn't get out of it. And around seven I start to get ready. I wear the dress, Klaus mother gift me. The way it is all white and flowy with flowers brings so much summer at Hawaii feels. I smile at myself. I didn't put makeup, I just brush throw my hair. I put my flip flops so I will be comfortable. My mom yells out for me of the kitchen.

" Melanie "

I look at the door of my room. 

" Melanie, come we are leaving "

She yells again. I stand from the chair I was sitting on and take my phone. I walk out of my room and I appear in front of them. I again didn't look at Klaus. My mom rolls her eyes at me, annoyed.