Too Playa

This Time Around

Avi POV-

"Is this weird?" I slightly smiled looking across the table at Odell.

"You making it weird. So yeah." He said eating his food I had prepared.

Because we both had too much baggage from the past we thought it would be best, and Dr. Lee agreed, if we started over. Re-learn each other. Build trust. We couldn't pick up where we left off. We needed new rules, boundaries and fresh expectations.

So I decided to cook him a dinner with all his favorite foods at my apartment. And us just take things slow. Not even a date. Just like a getting to know you thing.

"How am I making it weird?" I asked him.

"You keep staring at me. I know I'm the finest man you been with." He said stuffing his mouth with the T-Bone steak I made.

"You wish." I rolled my eyes.

He smirked looking at me, taking a sip of his wine.

I blushed back, then turned my attention to cutting my steak.

"I don't do sex on the first date either. In case you thought I was a hoe or something." He said digging his fork in his baked potato with sour cream.

I threw a napkin at his head.

"Stop abusing me." He ate the piece of baked potato on his fork.

There was a bit of silence us just eating. Occasional glances at each other, then back to our food.

"You're making me nervous." I admitted.

And he was. My stomach was fluttering like he didn't know every inch of my heart and body.

"Why?" He chuckled.

"I don't know. I guess I just want to get it right this time. I've waited so long to have you back. And I want to get it right." I heard my voice crack. I cleared my throat and held back my tears. I instead looked down and focused on my food.

"And I want not just you, but us to get it right." He emphasized us looking at me. "I've been waiting just as long."

We just looked each other in the eyes. Searching each other. Reassuring each other. This time, would not just be one sacrificing but it would be a group effort.

"What do you need from me to make this time work?" I broke our silent gaze.

"I need you to match my giving. Match my sacrifice. Match my effort. Match my love. I want you to be vulnerable with me. Be honest with me about how you feel about everything. If you love me, tell me that. If you feening for me, tell me that. If you mad at me, tell me that shit to. But I want us to be so vulnerable with each other, where I know you inside and out so well, we don't need words. I want to know without a doubt giving you a second chance was not a mistake." He looked at me.

"I hear you." I said softly, taking in what he said. And I knew it would be a journey for me to give him all that, but I was up for the trip.

"Oh yeah, and two more kids. I need that."

I smacked my lips and we both laughed.

"Nah but forreal, what do you need?" He asked seriously.

"Um, just for you know to know I am trying to give you what you need. And it may take some patience, but I will get there."

He shook his head okay.

"I hear you Avi, and I'll be patient, but if you mess up big, no more chances. I've been patient before. I've labored with you. But after this, I don't have much more."

"I know."

His phone lit up.

We both looked at it.

"How are you going to tell her?" I asked.

He sighed and hit ignore. "I'll find a way."

"Sorry for complicating your life."

"Its a good complication." He smiled.

I smiled back.

There was silence while we ate. He would occasionally look at me.

"Tell me something you wanted to tell me but never told me before." He said out of nowhere finishing up his food.

This was him testing me to see if I was willing to be vulnerable with him.

"While I was away my dildo's name was OBJ." I covered my face not believing I told him that.

He bursted into laughter.

"Stop laughing. I'm already embarrassed."

"You should be."  

"Shut up." I rolled my eyes.

"Something serious please." He said.

"Fine. I hurt everyday I wasn't with you. I wanted to come back earlier. But I was too afraid to face you. And I know I said I came back for Oak, but it was me too." I hated revealing all these things. But I knew it was necessary. It made me feel so naked and exposed.

But I had to remember O was not my dad. He loved me just as much as Marshawn did.

He took a minute to just look at me. "Thank you for sharing. I needed to hear that."

"You're welcome." I let out a slight smile.

"You wanna know mine?"

"Oh god." I wasn't read.

"Why you Oh God?"

"Is it good or bad?"

"Just listen."

"Fine."

"I tried to cover the hurt of you leaving with other women. And I had my pick of the litter. But none of them even came close to what I felt about you."

I looked at him.

He looked at me.

We didn't have to say another word.

We both felt that this time around would be better.

——-

i am so sorry yall for the long break. I was mad busy. But shes back. Thank yall for waiting.❤️❤️