It's Not Enough.

Chapter 13

It didn't take me long to find Rodger since he was buried in his locker trying to get his shit all organized. Even now from my place on the other side of the hallway I could see the bruises that littered his face. One on his left cheek sweled up along his jawline making it look large and stopping on the side of his jaw ending just before it could connect to the one the almost fully envelopes his eye.

   I knew he probably didn't want to talk to me especially since I was kind of my fault this happened to him... ok! All my fault! But still i needed to apologize to him. I know it might not mean much but it was the only thing I could do to make this situation better. At least that's what I told myself as I headed further down the hall until I stoped right next to his locker.

"Hey Rodger," I greeted gently hoping my tone would make him feel relaxed but judged by the fact that he almost jumped 5 feet into the air I'm going to say I failed desperatly.

"W-w-what do you want!?" He stutters nervously, his split bottom lip trembling slightly. His voice sounded husky, tired even, compared to his normal cocky tone.

"Look I just wanted to apologize," I sighed leaning getly against the locker with my shoulder. Any hint of fear was replaced by a burning anger clear in his brown eyes.

"Apology not accepted," He spat angrily at me, slamming his locker door angrily in emphasis. Drama queen much I muttered to myself at his dramatic act. 

"Look I know you were kind enough to help me out and I kissed you which is my fault because I was drunk and easn't thinking but I didn't man for you to get hurt I swear," I tried to defend. He's been to enough parties to know that stuff can get out of hand.

"Oh well I guess since you didn't mean for it to happen it totally makes up for the fact that I was almost beaten to a bloody pulp," He shouted dramatically. Well I guess that approach didn't work. I sighed.

"Ok Rodger what do I need to do to make this up to you?" I asked not really knowing if anything good would come from me asking.

"What you can do? What you can do is keep you're stupid guard dogs the hell away from me!" He shouted shifting his arm over to grab a pair of krutches I hadn't eve known was there. Looking down I finally noticed the fact that Rodgers right ankle was wrapped gently with muscle wrap. But it also didnt look broken more like a pulled muscle kind of thing.

"Ok fine, I'll make sure the guys stay away from you, except for at practice because I can't help that but I'll make sure they don't talk, sit, or even glance in your direction unless absolutly necessary, ok?" I offered. Trying to convince the boys to stay away from Rodger wouldn't be too hard considering they already didn't like him very much anyway.

"Ok." He states. There was a hint of gratitude in his voice but it wasn't so easily detected under his emotionless words. With the terms being agreed on Rodger figured it was time to part ways so he positioned his krutched properly under his arms and turned abrubtly pushing forward in the opposite direction of me. Except I couldn't end it just like that.

"Hey Rodger!" I yelled slightly drawing his attention back to me. Slowly he glanced over his shoulder at me, his face deadpan. "I really am sorry." I put every ounce of sincerity into my voice, and even in my eyes. Guilt about what happened to him was almost eating me alive because in this rare occasion Rodger didn't deserve to get his ass kicked.

He didn't say anything back but I swear I saw a hint of a smile playing on his lips and just that little thing made my shoulders lighten, all that guilt not completely weighing me down. I remained in the same spot until his figure disappeared within the crowd of people and then I moved heading in the direction of my Math class.

A huge goofy smile was edged onto my face.

~*~

All of the boys agreed to leaving Rodger alone. The ony one a little reluctant was Ryan who said he still wanted to take him down a few notches but after smacking him upside the head a few times he finally decided to comply.

Now we all sat lazily around our normal round table in the cafeteria. It had the perfect location right by the window on, one step above some of the other tables on the platform set up like a stage but not really. Ryan and Nick were fighting to see who could scarf down their cafeteria prepared spagetti faster and Travis was having a hell of a good time recording it.

"Go Ryan!! WOOT WOOT!" I cheered through my laughter. "Come on Nick show him whose boss!"

"You can't cheer for both of them! Pick a side!" Taylor exclamied from his place next to Travis who kept elbowing him ever so slightly to get a better shot of the two stuffing their faces. After sending Travis a deathly glare that seemed to go unnoticed by him, lucky bastard, he turned back to me.

"Why not?" I ased.

"Because you have to pick a side it's just how it goes," He stated vaguely. I crossed my arms over my chest defensivly ignoring the still half full tray of food laying in front of me.

"And who says. I love them both so I am cheering them both on. It's not like it really matter who wins anyway!" I explained. All this is, is a little lunch time fun but of course Taylor had to let his competative side break through. I guess it wasn't really his fault though...my thoughts trailing off from where they were going. I didn't want to think about that right now.

"Why are you frowning?" He asked suddenly. My hand instantly went up to feel my lips whih had indeed fallen to a sulken frown without me even knowing. Quickly I put on a gentle smile.

"I'm not sure..." I whispered for only him. It wasn't as if anyone else was listening in on our conversation. Nick, Ryan, and Travis were too busy with their food while Gavin and Adam were in a deep conversation about something, I don't know, boy things I guess.

I just didn't want to let Taylor know I was thinking about his family or even ruin his mood by mentioning them. I know they were a sore subject for him.

"You sure you're ok?" Worry evident within his features. His blazing blue eyes softened slightly as they glanced oer every inch of my face taking in it's every details, his mouth forming a thin line like it normally does when he is concentrating, his eyebrows scrunching together.

"I'm sure," I laughed slightly in reassurance hoping he would drop the subject. My hand reached out and rested on his comfortably trying to explain with this simple touch that I really was ok. I was actually more worried about him than myself.

Taylor's gaze shifted from my hand that rested gently against his own up to my face. i could practically see the gears working in his head, processing what to say next.

"Zara..." He started, his voice tired yet determined mixing together in a gentle breeze, his voice becoming a whisper under the sudden shout that interrupted his next words.

 "Babbyyyyyy!" A high pitched wail, as I would describe it, pireced through the yammering that flooded through the caferteria causing most of it to come to an abrubt halt, mid conversation, so those interested could glance over at the tiny blonde haired banshee running through the cafeteria.

The figure ran forward until it connected itself with Adam, ignoring me in my seat next to him entirely, while she slammed her lips into his.