memories ﻬ am

One

~Kaitlin Winchester~

Was I dead? Is this what it feels like to be dead?

I look at the scene in front of me watching as Austin pushes some blonde hair behind my ear to reveal my tear stained face. Wow, I look so broken today.

I know this day... I don't want to though.

"You promise you won't forget about me, Austin?" I find myself whispering as I stare up at my tall best friend. His strong arms are wrapped around my waist tightly and mine are around his neck. His warmth instantly surrounding my body and making me feel safe.

I remember this moment so well. This is when Austin left me for his tour. This is the one moment I never forgot because he lied straight to his best friends face.

"I promise you, Kaitlin. I will never forget about you, ever," he whispers as he stares down at me. I notice his eyes sparkle as he looks down at me. He meant it.

No he didn't... Wow I sure was stupid.

I watch as the familiar scene unfolds. Austin pulling me into his arms and kissing my forehead so sweetly as if we were some young couple in love. People always confused us thinking we were dating, but no. Never got the chance to.

I always was in love with Austin. I got over it though when he left about a year ago. He seemed too busy to even shoot me a text. I had to change my number too since mine had gotten leaked some how. I guess being Austin's old best friend meant I was important. Austin had other ways to contact me, and I even dmed him saying I got a new number. But nothing.

He drifted away.

Austin walks off into the plane, and I wish I knew that was the last time I'd see him. That was going to be the last time for the rest of my life that I got to hug him because look at me now.

I stand there, tears running down my face.

I felt so many emotions this day. I was proud that he finally got his dream. I was depressed he was leaving for so long. I was happy for him because he seemed so happy with what was coming. I was angry I never told him how I felt before he left.. I was just confused on how I felt. I was ashamed of never telling him I loved him.

I decide to follow Austin into the plane, leaving my crying figure behind to follow him. To see what he did after this. I never knew and now I was being given a chance to so I took it.

I watch as Austin continues to glance back at me, his eyes turning gloomy yet were strong around me. I didn't see how sad he really was until now. He didn't wanna go did he? He actually did care about me.

In that moment I wanted to reach out to him. I wanted to tell him to stay. I wanted to tell him to give up his dream and just stay with me. I wanted to tell him I was in love with him and that somehow he loved me too. I wanted to just hold him and let him cry in my arms rather then alone.

Austin soon takes his seat on the plane next to his mom, and another tear rolls down his cheek. I didn't know he cried over me. I didn't know he was as broken as me.

"Did you tell her?" I hear Michele whisper to him, making me furrow my eyebrows. Tell me what? What was Austin suppose to tell me? I go forward, trying to listen in better. I wanted to make sure I was hearing right.

"I couldn't mom, I'm scared. I just need to cut her out of my life..." He says, making his mom look at him in confusion.

"Austin-"

"Mom, just let me do this. It's better for both of us..." He whispers, his voice cracking slightly. He tried to not just cry and lose it on the plane, but he was broken. I didn't want him to be, but he was. Austin was broken without me. He just let me slip away. He wanted this all along.

He thought it was better when in reality it was tearing us apart.

Is this really what had happened? Is that really what he thought? I think as I take a seat in an empty airplane chair. My eyes stay locked on Austin's sad figure as my mind wanders off.

Am I dead?

Or am I dreaming?

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First official chapter! Eyyy! :) I hope youre liking it so far. I may change the cover photo for the story but I am in love with the picture of Austin to be honest.