(19.)

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Bella

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Bella

I had been in labor for a few hours now and nobody has told me what was wrong and why I was feeling like my entire body was feeling like it was about to rip into two. Sure, I knew that labor was going to be painful, but something seriously didn't feel right and I was scared.

"I can't take this pain." I cried, squeezing Gabe's hand. He had been my rock since we got here and I know I've been a complete pain in the ass, but not once had he complained of left my side.

"I know baby. Do you want me to see if they can give you something for the pain?" He asked me. I nodded my head, as he kissed my forehead. "Okay, I'll be right back and I'll call and see if your parents have made it as well." I nodded as he quickly left the room, leaving me alone, as I rubbed my stomach. I feared that something was wrong with my baby, but I didn't want to think negatively at the moment. I just hoped and prayed that he or she was okay, and that we'd both make it through this painful process.

"Hey my little angel...you're really hurting mommy right now, but you know what? If this is what I have to go through to ensure that you're safe, then I'll deal with it. Just please...ease up a little because you're killing me." I took a deep breath, laying my head back, as I slowly rubbed my stomach. The moment I had been looking forward to had finally arrived, but I couldn't even enjoy it because I was in so much pain. I probably sounded crazy and hysterical, like most first time moms, but I wasn't crazy. Something was wrong and it was scaring me half to death.

When Gabe returned, he had told me that a nurse was going to come bring me something to ease my pain, but since I wasn't fully dilated or even close to ten centimeters...I couldn't get the epidural. 

"You are so strong and beautiful, you know that?" He said, sitting next to me. 

"I don't feel strong or beautiful right now." I said, honestly. 

"Well you are, both strong and beautiful, and when this is all over and we see our baby for the first time...this moment will be like a distant memory."

"I hope so." I closed my eyes, feeling a contraction take over, as I breathed through the pain. Gabe grabbed my hand, despite me literally squeezing the life out of his hand, he continued to let me do so. "I need my mom."

"I know baby, but their flight hasn't landed yet. They'll be here soon though and hopefully you won't be in so much pain." He sighed, gently caressing my cheek. I know he felt useless, especially when there was nothing he could do to take this pain away, but he was doing much more then that.

"Hey..." I said, pulling him down and kissing his lips. "Thank you for being my rock. I know I'm being a complete pain in the ass right now, whining and calling out for my mama, but you have no idea how much it means to me that you're here. Of course, you have no choice, but still." He smiled a little, kissing me once again, as he pressed his forehead against mine. Bad move on his part, because a contraction came, and my hands were gripping his dreads. 

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