Helping Emma

Chapter 4

"Ok buddy, you ready for that walk now?"  She pats the horse and gently pulls on the reins and Rocinante begins to walk next to her. Regina smiles as she watches them walking together. She walks quickly to catch up to them. "That was really great Emma. If you decide to hang out with Rocinante and I for a while, I think this could help you". They both smile at each other. Emma doesn't say anything just yet. They just continue with a slow walk. Rocinante comes to a stop in a big open field and starts eating some grass. "Regina. Can I be honest with you?"   "If you want this situation to work, I think it would be for the best".  "I've already told you that I don't know a thing about animals, but I do like it here and do hope that this will work, but there are 3 things that I think will hold me back from all that". Emma stops speaking for a moment. "Would you like to tell me what those are?"  "Well 1st is that I'm not usually good with talking about my feelings sometimes. 2nd, I'm kinda afraid that if I go home I won't come back. It's not because I don't want to, it's just that when I get home, I get in my t-shirt and sweat pants and I can just lay in my bed for days. I even missed my appointment with Dr. Hopper the other day because I didn't feel like getting out of bed". Emma stops taking before she says the 3rd reason. "That was only 2 reasons Emma, didn't you say there were 3?"  "Yes, but I'm kinda embarrassed by the last one". She says with a little blush in her cheeks. "Emma, do you know what a safe space is?" Emma nods. "Well this farm is a safe space. My father always wanted it that way and I will always continue on with that. You will not be judged because of who you are, what you are or who you want to be. You can tell me if you want, but I will not push you if you don't". Regina says sincerely while looking into Emma's eyes. Emma pats the horse a little for some courage. "Ok. I guess I should just say it because it won't help me if I don't. Regina, I find you very, very attractive, and even though this type of therapy may help me, I don't know if I can do it".  "Well, I guess it's my turn to be honest as well. I also find you attractive Emma, and I do think that this will help you. I have a few suggestions for you. 1. We work here together and I will try to help you with whatever is going on. 2. If you are afraid that you won't come back, I have a small attic apartment. It's really only one big room, but it has everything. A little kitchen area, a nice bathroom and bed and a few chairs. Oh and of course a tv. It's yours at no charge. All you have to do is get up every morning when we do and get to work. I'll be honest it's a long hard days work, and in the long run you may even learn something about yourself, and lastly, I'm not a therapist, so it won't be unethical for us to date, but I do suggest that we wait on our feelings for each other till you work out whatever it is you are going through, then maybe we can pursue something more. How does that sound?"  "So you want me to move in here, with you?"  "No. Not just with me. There are other workers that live here. I have a few farmhands that live and pay a small fee for room and board while they do their jobs. You will be the only one that has their own space. It has a private entrance and you can either join us for meals or make your own". Emma does like the idea, but for some reason she's becoming very nervous about it. "How many men live here?" She says with a little fear in here voice. "There are 3 right now, but all of them have had back ground checks. None of them are violent, they are just young men that have had a rough time and are trying to make a new life". Regina sees water starting to form in Emma's eyes and all of a sudden Emma becomes very withdrawn and she seems to have trouble breathing. "Emma dear are you ok? Please. What's wrong? Let me help you". She quickly hands the reins over to Regina. "Here. I'm sorry. Maybe this isn't going to work out after all. I'm sorry I waisted your time". She's not thinking clearly and she gives Regina a kiss on the cheek. I'll see you both around". She pats Rocinante gently and gives him a kiss right above the nose. "Bye boy. Listen to Regina now, ok. Goodbye Regina". A tear slips out as she looks into Regina's eyes. "Emma please wait". Regina says as she gently touches Emma's arm and she can feel her shaking. "You can talk to me. It's ok Emma, your safe here. Look around. No one is here. It's just us". Emma looks around quickly, and sees just a wide open field. "I won't make you stay here if you don't want to, but please try to calm down before you leave. We can continue our walk for a little while longer". Emma takes another look around. She still doesn't see anyone, so she nods to Regina. "Thank you". Regina slowly starts walking with Emma following closely next to her. After a few minutes of silence, Emma asks Regina a question. "Did Archie tell you about me at all?"  "It's against the law for him to tell me anything medical about you, all he did say was that you recently had a bad experience and needed help to manage your anxiety". Emma just nodded and continued walking. "9 weeks ago I was kidnapped and assaulted".