Anxious Boy

37

Woke up in the middle of the night from a nightmare, shaking and sweating. Then I started crying because I'm afraid of losing Luke. Look at the time to see 3 am and I decide that I should draw. Set up the camera and think of who to draw. 

"Babe." Luke knocks on the door and walks in when it's 7 am. Another hour and I'll be done with my art.

"You've been up for a long time. Why weren't you in bed when I woke up?" Luke looks at me worried.

"I had a nightmare." Start to shake again and he starts walking closer to me.

"About?" He's waiting for me to answer.

"Losing you." Then I start crying some more as he holds me close.

"Wish I didn't have to go to the studio today." He kisses the top of my head as we pull away. For about five minutes, he watches me draw a picture of him and then we hug. We kiss and he leaves, within an hour I have finished my art. Get ready for the day, eat some breakfast and drink some coffee as I edit the video. 

ART S1:E13

LUKE HEMMINGS!

Then I randomly get the urge to make a cover to help calm me down some more. 

COVERS S1:E14

KATY PERRY- TEENAGE DREAM!

This one is for my boyfriends. 

COVERS S1:E15

JUICE WRLD- LUCID DREAMS!

My dreams and nightmares seem so damn real.

COVERS S1:E16

HAWTHORNE HEIGHTS- OHIO IS FOR LOVERS!

Don't ask, but this is helping me cope. People are loving the covers and Luke comes home.

"Hey babe, lets eat some dinner." He brought home fast food. We sit at the table and eat.

"Can you tell me what happened in your nightmare?" He asks as my breath hitches, but not in a good way. So I basically told him everything that was said and done in the nightmare.

"Babe, that's never gonna happen. I know I turned my back on you and betrayed you, but it won't ever happen again because I promised you." Luke briefly brings up him cheating on me.

"I know that." Try to calm myself down. We drink a beer after finishing our dinner and then throw the empty bottles away. We get into his bed, cuddle and fall asleep. His alarm wakes us up and he kisses the top of my head after he finishes getting ready and leaves. Get up and go into the office deciding to do more covers since I have nothing better to do. 

COVERS S1:E17

JAMES BAY- LET IT GO!

Need to distract myself from the pain.

"Lets go to the bar." Luke texts and tells me the boys will be there too along with One Direction.

"Alright." Reluctantly I agree to it since I remember Luke cheating not too long ago. Meet them at the bar and start slowly drinking doing shots, then drink some beer. Girls are flirting with Luke and he's kind of flirting with them too. Start to feel drunk after a while and I feel like everything is becoming too much. Walk out to the alleyway and then I hear a female start to flirt with me, wanting me to come home with her. She sounds sober and I'm trying to just tell her to leave me alone. Her hand goes down my pants and I freeze not sure of what to do. Last thing is her lips on my skin and now the alcohol makes me black out.