Everyone Dies (Except Galadriel)

Chapter 3: Of the Coming of the Elves and the Captivity of Melkor, Pt. I

Hello guys. I don't think it's an update day, but I've kinda given up on that. 

This chapter's been dedicated to @darthwitty who was one of my first followers, as well as one of my first readers, and quite a loyal commenter as well. They're a great author and I personally have enjoyed reading their NCIS/Marvel crossover, Special Agent Loki Laufeyson even though I've only ever watched NCIS. 

11/10, would definitely recommend. Go forth, dear readers, and enjoy the literature (and leave a few well-deserved votes to their stories while you're at it!) 

Also blame them for this chapter being late because I started writing this at 9:00 this morning and it's now 5:00 pm. I got distracted by reading. 

For shame darthwitty, for shame. 

***

This chapter sounds promising!

Ahem.

The Valar lived without anything bad happening in their comfy little Valinor. Only Yavanna and Oromë (hunter dude) really came back to Middle Earth; Yavanna basically walked around and sulked and felt sorry for the plants. No specifics on what Oromë was doing but I assume it was hunting.

Melkor, meanwhile, was building an army, as one does. He had some demons, he had some Balrogs, he had some monsters, and everything was super rad. Those weren't the only monsters and evil things, but that's all I really feel like naming at present. Aside from creating an army, he Melkor also created an armory and a fortress, which are both good things to have. His biggest fortress was commanded by his boyfriend, Sauron. 

Oh. Did I say "boyfriend"? I meant Lieutenant. 

And boyfriend. I meant that too. 

Anybody else ship them? 

In fairness, I ship a lot of people. But this is my opinionated retelling, and so I get to say who is dating who. 

It hath been ordained. 

Anyway, Yavanna doesn't like that Melkor has been doing evil things, so she goes to Manwe crying, like "bruh all my plants are dying it's so sad we have to do something". 

Tulkas, ever ready for a fight, was like "hell yeah let's fight the bitch!" 

Manwe told Mandos to speak. Because...I don't know why he couldn't have just spoken himself or let Mandos decide when he wanted to speak but. Anyway. 

"In this age the Children of Ilúvatar shall come indeed, but they come not yet. Moreover it is doom that the Firstborn shall come in the darkness, and shall look first upon the stars. Great light shall be for their waning. To Varda ever shall they call at need."

Basically, yeah, it's kinda dark and dreary out there, but no elves are actually here yet so. BUT we do get to see Mandos's doom-proclaiming powers in action, so that's cool. 

Varda's like, "well sounds good to me!" She then goes and makes a shit ton of stars. This takes a really long time, so while she's doing that, the elves wake up. I'm not sure if she meant to be finished by the time they woke up or not, but they really liked the stars and so they liked Varda more than they liked anyone else. 

The elves named themselves the Quendi. This gives rise to the name of their original language Quenya.

Now. Pause for a teaching moment here. While Quenya is the language that most of the people we talk about here speak, it is NOT what would be considered "elvish", nor would it be what the elves like Legolas and whatnot spoke in LotR. That's Sindarin, and we'll get there, but it's good to know that there's a difference. 

Back to the story, Oromë came lurking about to meet them. Some of the elves were like "omg hi it's so nice to meet you" while others jumped on the Nope train to Fuckthatville and ran away. Oromë then went back to Valinor to tell his fellow Valar that the elves had, indeed, awoken.

That's it for now guys! I really recommend checking out @darthwitty and her stuff! 

I'll be trying to spotlight some of my other readers, starting with the ones who have been here the longest and have kept reading and commenting. I really, really appreciate all the support that I've gotten and I'd like to return the favor. 

Sarissë out.