Everyone Dies (Except Galadriel)

Chapter 6: Of Feänor and the Unchaining of Melkor

Is it just me or does sitting in the waiting room of an urgent care place not knowing whether or not they're gonna stick you with needles and steal your blood make you feel like you're back in the French Revolution waiting to be guillotined?

So according to my comments,@daughter-of-feanor participates in the weird elven tradition of dancing around barefoot. You do you friendorino, have a dedication.

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Like way back in April, our good pal Melkor was captured when the Valar finally decided to get off their asses and do something, and he was wrapped in some magical chains. From the title of this chapter, I'm hoping you're able to deduce that we're about to take those chains off. 

Which sounds like a totally reasonable and smart decision to make.

That's going to come later, though.

The chapter starts by basically giving Feänor's biography which I've already covered for the most part. It talks about how his mom was like "right here's the baby, bye fam" right after he was born. 

Apparently, Feänor was Finwë's "most beloved son" so that's great. 

We love favoritism. 

That always turns out just fantastic. 

Feänor is basically described as being tall and having a nice face. Cool I guess? 

Then Tolkien tells us basically everything I said before so...we gonna skip that. 

So. Onto Melkor and his chains. 

Basically, once he had served his...prison sentence I guess...he asked Manwë to pardon him and was like "I swear that I'll like, help you do good stuff" and Nienna totally backed him up because...

...I really don't know the answer to that one actually...

(Nienna is the one who cries all the time and might be a lesbian in case you forgot.)

Then Tolkien helpfully tells us that Manwë didn't say anything, so that's exciting. 

He did pardon him though (without saying anything I guess) on the condition that Melkor hang out in Valinor and prove that he's not going to be evil anymore. And while we pretty much know that's never going to happen, Melkor is apparently a great actor and he waltzed around seeming like a totally nice and chill person. 

Aaaaaand then we get back to how cool Manwë is again. 

Literally in the same sentence where Tolkien tells us that Melkor totally deceived his brother and Manwë 110% fell for it, he goes on to wax poetic about the latter because apparently that's what we do any time the guy's name is even mentioned. 

"For Manwë was free from evil and could not comprehend it, and he knew that in the beginning, in the thought of Ilúvatar, Melkor had been even as he..." 

So basically, Manwë's not stupid, he's just so fucking amazing and pure that he legit can't comprehend that his brother is evil. 

Right.

Okay.

Sure. 

If Manwë isn't stupid then I'm actually a duck.