Everyone Dies (Except Galadriel)

Chapter 9: Of the Flight of the Noldor, Pt. 8.5 Gajillion apparently

Guys guys guys.

We are #2 in all the Silmarillion books. 

#2!!!!!!!

*Sound of Sarisse screaming incoherently into the void with excitement*

Seriously though, thank you all so very much. I just found out that we're going to have to put one of my dogs down last night and idk, realizing that people on the internet like my bullshit made me feel better for some reason.

This chapter is dedicated to Snowball. 

I'm so sorry I couldn't do more, buddy. I swear I tried. 

I'm publishing this book in an edited version on Ao3 and today I posted the chapter about Aule and Yavanna. The Author's notes made me realize that I posted that chapter when I had to put my dog down LAST year...interesting timing...

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So if you recall the Teleri, the last group to come to Valinor who live by the ocean and have cool boats, Feanor and company arrive at their city of Alqualonde and are like "hey guys we really need to borrow your ships please" and the Teleri are like "haha uh...sorry no can do." 

It also says that they "cast" some of the Noldor "into the sea" because of it? 

So...

Feanor: Hey dude, my dad just got murdered, you know, your BFF Head Elf Dude, and Melkor stole my cool jewels, can we borrow your ships maybe to go across the ocean so we can hunt them down?

Olwe: (punts an elf off the dock) Nah no can do. (yeets a second elf into the waves)

Naturally, Feanor and the others decide to slaughter like half of them in order to take the ships by force. 

Okie then. 

Everyone's just making rational choices all around.

I'm just gonna go ahead and point out that this is only our first gigantic massacre. Later on, it's called The Kinslaying at Alqualonde or simply The First Kinslaying. 

Yes. The First.

There will be more, don't worry. 

What happened, basically, was it was an equal fight between Feanor's people and the Teleri and the number of people getting killed on both sides was pretty even. Until, of course, the second group of the Noldor led by the Double Fins (Feanor's half brothers remember) came over the hill or whatever and went "oh boy it looks like the Teleri are attacking our friends" and flat out decimated the remaining Teleri. 

Pause for a second. 

Let's analyze this. 

I'm not saying that the Teleri deserved to be massacred. 

But when a guy comes to you and is like my dad got fucking murdered and we really need to borrow your ships I feel like the decent thing to do would be like...at least let them take one or two and just make sure they agree to bring them back? 

Obviously, just like the Valar weren't entitled to Feanor's Silmarils, the Noldor aren't entitled to the Swan Ships. 

I just think that like...in the Silmaril situation, the Valar had already fucked up poor Feanor's life to the max over stuff that wasn't really his fault and then they demanded his prized possessions just for the sake of having them, like nobody on their side died, their cool trees got knocked over, I mean boo hoo get over yourselves. 

But now we have grief-stricken Feanor who did just suffer the loss of his dad and is trying to hunt down the Dark Lord who is making everyone's life miserable. He asks Olwe to just borrow some ships to go after the guy...and we can assume that Finwe and Olwe were good pals, right, considering that the reason that Thingol got lost and did the whole staring in the woods thing with Melian was because he was trying to catch up with the Noldor and hang out with them...would they...not...want...Melkor to be punished?