It's been a week after Luca's confession about his feelings. I thought he was just drunk kaya niya nasabi 'yun. That kiss, I can still remember it. The intensity and the feeling that it brought to my system. Wala pa ring nagbago sa nararamdaman ko at parang mas tumindi pa nga. But I want to be sure that what he feels for me is really true.
"What's wrong?" He asked ng bigla ko lang siyang itulak.
"You're just drunk, Luca." Nag-iwas ako ng tingin.
"No, I'm not! I know I love you even before, Tazanna. I was just confused with my feelings. I admit it. I'm coward! But after three years of patiently waiting for you to come back, without you by my side, I know that I love you and I'm still is. He explained with a weary eyes.
"You're just guilty of what happened, Luca. It is not love. I know it. Guilt is different from love."
"Yes, because it was my fault! A part of me is furious and guilty of what had happened to you back then but that doesn't mean that I don't love you. I'm just coward to show to you what I really felt. Damn it! I'm not used to this kind of feelings because it's only you who make me feel like this!"
"No! You shouldn't feel that way. It's not your fault. A-and maybe you're just confused because of it.
"Still doesn't change the fact that I'm one of the reason it happened. Fuck! It really hurts seeing you lying on the hospital bed, unconscious. It hurts and it's also killing me seeing you also hurting."
He's looking sad and frustrated. I don't know how to say or how to feel. Everything is just so confusing and overwhelming but I can't give him my complete trust just yet.
"Do you love me?" I asked him. Nakita ko kung paano rin siya nasaktan sa nangyari. Tumingin siya sa akin at parang nabuhayan ng loob.
"I love you, Tazanna even if you don't love me ." He replied.
"Then, prove it!" Tumango-tango lang siya at nakita ko ang pagliwanag ng kanyang mukha. Hindi ko rin mapigilan ang sariling 'di ngumiti.
Hinawakan niya ang pisngi ko. "Thank you, baby. Promise, I will never hurt you again."
"Matulog na nga tayo. May trabaho pa tayo bukas." Pagyaya ko sa kanya para maiba ang usapan at baka tuluyan pa akong bumigay.
"Okay. Goodnight, Taz."
"Goodnight too, Luca." He opened the door for me at pumasok na ako. He closed the door after and I slowly sat on my bed, still can't believe what he just said.
Tatayo na sana ako para makapag-shower pero biglang bumukas ang pinto at nakita kong nag-alinlangang pumasok si Luca.
"Wala ba akong goodnight kiss dyan?" Pabiro pa niyang sabi.
"Hoy! Monte Verde. Nanliligaw ka palang kaya walang kiss." Nakangiti kong sabi.
