Unrequited love

huit

he said "relax baby girl, you're mine." and his lips tasted like vodka, his breath smelled like cigarettes. The flashing images of him smacking Alex' head wouldn't stop racing through my mind.

"you leave her alone." his eyes showed anger and he was determined to get me, no matter what.

"I'm sorry but who are you?" Alex didn't sound scared.

Matthew's eyes flickered and in a second his fist went full force onto Alex' face.

"Matthew what the fuck?" I screamed, trying to help Alex to get up, but Matty pulled me up and grabbed my hands so hard I couldn't do anything but to follow him wherever he was taking me.

His fingers traced the tip of my lips and I shivered at the touch.

"Matthew I don't know what you want from me." I said quietly, his finger on my lips showing me to shut up. He didn't stop staring at me and I kissed his fingers, slowly going to the lips, pushing him onto the bed.

"you're mine, you're mine, you're mine." he whispered repeatedly.

We just stared at each other, not saying a thing. I could still feel the dizziness in my mind, caused by the amount of alcohol I drank before, but this whole event sobered me up a bit.

I saw lust in his eyes, I knew he wanted me. He would get me, I couldn't help myself to let him have me even if he only called me up when he felt like it. 

"Why did you kiss him?" anger in his voice was noticable, but his eyes still looked at me as if I was the most beautiful being on Earth. 

"I was drunk and with a stranger and you were with her." he stayed quiet. Maybe it was the alcohol or just the moment felt right, but I knew I had to tell him.

"You know, we exist somewhere where nothing is certain, not even our hearts. Feels as if I keep on spinning around while ribcages keep on breaking. And maybe I feel alive like that, maybe the tearing of my heart is the only thing that's alive within my body. The first time I met you, I felt as if there exists so much more than the tearing and the breaking. I wanted you to show me all that is sunny and wanted to live it all with you, wanted to walk through the dark and the light. Can't explain it. I can't tell if I fell in love the first moment I saw you or the second time or the third, but I can tell that the first moment I felt your lips on mine, I realized that somehow the rest of the world seemed to vanish when I was with you. Even though you made me not being able to kiss you back because of the shock, but oh god, it felt so good." he still didn't say a thing. So I continued.

"You know, I drank so much of tequila my head was spinning and I swear, I did forget about you for just a little bit of time. But Seeing you with that girl.. I don't know, it felt horrible. I never thought that if you were sad and kissed a stranger could feel so exhilarating. But I guess, you're nothing more than a stranger to me as well." 

He kissed my neck, then my jaw, my cheek and finally, my lips. 

"You know, I'll break your heart."

"At least I'll feel something." I kissed him back.

"sometimes I wonder if love can be found. What if once,you loose it and it never returns?" he looked at me for a moment before inhaling the cigarette smoke.

"Just don't be afraid to love, don't think about the end before it even starts. It ruins you."  his chest slowly went up, and then slowly down.

"I can't help it." I observed his face and it seemed as if every time I looked at him, I'd find something new. 

"And one thing Elizabeth, don't fall in love with people like me. Don't fall in love with me." I smiled.

"Too late for that."

"You don't want to feel agony and heartbreak." he pulled me closer to him.

"But being numb isn't much better." I could hear his heart beat.

He kissed me.

a/n: soooo short but because im probably not going to be able to update in some days i decided to at least write this. the other story will be updated this weekend, i hope you dont mind but school is killing me atm and ahh its so horrible:/ today I made this stupid thing at pe, we were supposed to run the Cooper test and we run it at the river bc its the exact length so yeah and bc I was rly tired and felt sick I didnt go around the river, but me and my friend went across the river and the professor found out and she said that the consequences of our acts will be the following: at grading the cooper test we'll get a grade lower, and that our acts will be remembered because that was lying and that was cheating and such so yes !! amazing anamaria!!! just amazing!!! this school sucks though, like literally, if you make a mistake, they'll treat you like a rebel like a cheater etc and thats just stupid.i mean, everyone makes a mistake right? that doesn't mean im a bad person.fuck.

hope you liked this though

spread love, anamaria xxx