Demigods As John Mulaney Quotes (Pt. 1)

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Child of Zeus: "Woah, that tall child looks terrible! Get some rest, tall child, you can't keep burning the candle at both ends!"

Child of Hades: "You remember being twelve, when you're like 'No one look at me or I'll kill myself'?"

Child of Poseidon: "I could never dress goth, and don't get me wrong. I'm unhappy, it's not that."

Child of Demeter: "I just want to sit here and feed my birds."

Child of Ares: "Well, see, you know how I'm filled with rage?"

Child of Athena: "I'll keep all my emotions right here, and then one day, I'll die."

Child of Apollo: "Hey, you could pour soup in my lap and I'd probably apologize to you."

Child of Artemis: "Shut up! You're all gonna die. Street smarts!"

Child of Hephaestus: "When I walk down the street, I need everybody, all day long, to like me so much."

Child of Aphrodite: "I was not 👉 an athletic 👉 child 👉."

Child of Hermes: "And I said 'No.' You know, like a liar."

Child of Dionysus: "I have a girlfriend now myself, which is weird because I'm probably gay based on the way I act and behave."

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