Ghost town

chapter twenty-two: the past

The sun was still in a state of slumber when Yvonne Meyers woke up shouting in agony. She felt like her soul had left her body for a moment.

She started to cry. Her shoulders shaking and her chest weaving. She felt like she was being suffocated.  She had awoken from a nightmare. The same one that always haunted her. She had this silly notion that she was cured from her past and nightmares,  for she only experienced that same nightmare once, ever since she had been in Harrisville. It had been Steven who comforted her.

She had not had that nightmare ever since. Yet, it came back. She had dreamt the same thing she always did. It was about her brother that she lost all those years ago.

When she finally calmed down,  she realised that she had soiled herself. That was not something new. She soiled herself quote often when she had this dream.

She got out of bed with haste and stripped herself off. She took off her bedding and threw all of her bedding and her pajamas into the washing machine.

She went into the shower and scrubbed herself down. She was tired and in pain. Her chest was aching and her legs felt like anchors holding her down.

She wanted to scream and punch something. She was angry and sad. Just so sad. The world seemed so bleak and grey. Her life seemed meaningless. She just wanted to spend her life under the covers of her bedding.

When she was finally done showering she went into her bedroom and put on some clean clothes and new bedding. When she looked at her watch, she saw that it was only five O' clock in the morning.

Yvie sighed as she sat down in the cold floor of her room.  She curled  herself into fetal position and cried. After some time she realised that she was crying with no tears. There was nothing more painful than crying with no tears. It was worse sort of pain one had to go through to manage to cry with no tears. It was a signal of breaking point for Yvie.

She hated her mind. She was happy and at peace. She and everything she wanted and needed. She had Steven Tarintino  who was an angel. She had Ms.  Pricilla and  Ms.  Lila who were like her surrogate mother's. She had Tracy Williamson, Matthew Williamson and Brandon Walker who were the people who made her laugh until she cried of joy. Yet, her brain had decided to bring back old memories to haunt her with.

Her eyes had just dipped down in preparation  for sleep when her phone ran. She got up and saw the caller was Ms. Pricilla. Taking a deep breath in she answered the call.

"Good mo-" she began, summoning up all the joy she could find,  but Ms. Pricilla cut her off.

"Good morning dear. I am sorry for cutting you off, but I have to be quick. Ms. Lila has fallen ill. I will be staying with her until she gets better. You will have to man the shop. I have already called Matthew Williamson to help you. I am truly sorry , but I have to go. Bye dear." Ms. Pricilla said. She had spoken so fast , Yvie was still processing all of the information.

Ms. Lila was sick and Ms. Pricilla will be looking after Ms.  Lila.  Matthew Williamson would be helping her with the shop. She sighed. She was going to call her sick today. For she could barely walk from her room to the bathroom. She was far to emotionally weak to think straight.

However, she told herself that she would get over it.  She could not live her life bound to her past and her emotions. Working and fresh air was maybe all she needed.

Therefore, she got up and got dressed. Her shift at the library only started at one O' clock. It was six O' clock, she had about 7 hours to get her emotions  together,  she thought.

It took Yvie longer than she thought to get her emotions together. Every five minutes she broke down crying. She felt weak and cold. She felt dead on the inside, yet she felt so dirty at the same time. 

When she finally managed to get her in control, she decided to eat something. Just the smell of her cereal caused her stomach to flip - flop. She decided to rather not eat anything. She got dressed for work, instead. When she was dressed, she went to sit in her garden.

She never did start a vegetable garden. She had been so engrossed with Steven. She was so busy trying to live her best life. She was so busy trying to live in the present. She was too consumed with the notion that she needed to live a life that she forgot about her reason for coming to the ghost town. She wanted to find herself and release herself from her past. Instead, she filled her days with work, love and adventures. She had not yet found her purpose. She was due to leave the ghost town in less than three months.

Both her mother and father had already reminded her that she was due home soon. Her mother also re-applied her to the universities. The acceptance letters where coming through , already.

She thought about Steven and their future. She truly felt strong emotions for him, she could even admit that she loved him. However, their where times were she would look at Steven and thought of her brother. The more she thought of her brother, the more her feelings for Steven altered.

Yvie sighed. Adulting was not an easy task. Trying to figure emotions was even harder.  Trying to figure out what she felt for Steven was even harder. The hardest thing to conquer is her past. She seems to cling on to it like it was a life jacket. She really thought she had let go of her past, however, reality woke her up. 

She laid on her back on the grass of her garden.  She stayed like that, watching the clouds pass by the blue sky and the rays of the sun covering her in a warm hug, until it was time for her to leave for work.

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Photo credited to original creators
Song credited to original creators,  Melanie Martinez -cry baby

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