How to kill Peter Parker

Chapter Five

Sunday 
11:03 P.M

And yet again, I welcome another night of no sleep.

I just heard the radio station talking about a robbery nearby, and I can't not do anything about it. It'll just be a quick trip there and back, and then I can keep my eye on the suspicious guy. I run to the car and open the trunk. I make sure nobody is watching and I grab my suitcase with my suit. I double check that nobody's watching, and I run as fast as possible to an alley nearby. I change into my suit- my spiderman suit- and set off to the location of the robbery. 

When I make it there, I see one guy and one girl, both armed and have masks, committing the robbery. I swing over there just as they are leaving the bank. I swing right in front of them and the startled look in their eyes gives me the confidence to continue. 

"Where do you think you're going?" I ask, and the guy lifts up his gun. But before he can shoot, I stick a web to it and pull it out of his grip. The girl tries the same thing, but I pull her gun behind me using a web as well. Then they both drop the bags of money they have and start running.

Oh no you don't.

I swing after them and pull the girl towards me. The guy doesn't stop. I push the girl against a street light and web her to it. Then I swing after the guy. Once I reach him it turns into a full fist fight. He punches my stomach. I'm taken aback a bit, but I use a web to pull him towards me and punch him in the face. He falls to the ground, blood spilling from his nose. I crouch down near him to check for weapons, then web him to the ground for the cops to find him.

Then I hear a gunshot.

Before I can react, I hear the sound of metal against metal, and then someone laughs. 

"Aha Spidey you totally would've died if I wasn't here to save your sweet, bubbly ass!" A voice I know says. 

I turn to face Deadpool, but he's facing the girl. I see him about to throw a katana at her.

"Deadpool no!" I screech, shooting a web at his katana and pulling it out of his hand. He doesn't say anything, but he turns to me. I can imagine he doesn't have a very amused look under that mask. 

I look back up to the girl and web over there, then snatch the gun out of her hand before she figures out a way to reload it. I web her hand onto the post and turn back to Deadpool, "You know it's not necessary to kill, right?" I say to him.

"Of course it's usually not necessary, but I can tell you one thing: it's more fun that way!" He exclaims, turning around and walking towards his katana. 

"Why are you here anyways? I was handling myself fine." I say, even though that last part may not be true.

"Oh really? That gun in your hand says otherwise." He says. I drop the gun in my hand and kick it to the side. 

"Deadpool we need to go, the cops are on their way." I say, hearing the sirens in the distance coming closer. 

I shoot a web to a building behind him and swing over there. I turn back and see him running in my direction. I wait on the building for him, and he makes it up the stairs after about 2 years. 

"Gee golly Spidey, you're supposed to be the nice one here but you make me run up a building? Using stairs?! That's kinda rude you know." He says when he catches up to me.

"That's payback for killing the innocent Captain on that ship." I reply. 

"Psh, you can't be sure he was even innocent." 

"Exactly! So how would you know?" I ask. He replies with a sigh. I get up from the crouched position I was in, and quickly run behind me, then I jump from the roof we were on to the building next to us. 

"Oh you think you're so cool now Spidey? Well I can do that too!" He says, a little whine in his voice. I cross my arms as I watch him taking a couple steps behind him, preparing to jump. 

He starts running, and once me makes it to the edge, he jumps. But his foot hit the wrong angle. Before I can do anything, he's plummeting down towards the ground. I quickly jump down after him, shooting a web at the wall beside me. But I'm too late. He hits the ground with a splat. 

Sunday
11:56 P.M

"Why didn't you tell me about this 'healing factor' before you went and jumped off the edge of a building?" I asked Deadpool angrily. He started laughing.

"Cuz it was funny! Duhh!" He laughs. I roll my eyes. 

"Well I've got somewhere to be, so if you'll excuse me, I must be going." I say, standing up off the ground we were sitting criss-cross-applesauce on while waiting for Deadpool to heal up.

"Aww where you gotta be sweetums?" He calls after me, standing up. 

"Don't call me that, and it's none of your business." I shoot back at him.

"Oh whaaat, sweet cheeks doesn't like hanging with the all-mighty indestructible amazingly fantastic Deadpool?" He taunts. I whip around and look up to him- taking a minute to realize how close we are to each other. 

"That's not it-I- don't call me that!" I say, stepping back a bit. 

"Awwe, you're so cute when you're mad!" He says. I furrow my eyebrows he can't see while my cheeks get hot.

"Ugh, I hate you Deadpool." I say in annoyance.

"I know you mean love!" He says in an obnoxious tone. I turn away from him and start making my way back to the wedding.