If I Awake

Chapter 12

I haven't been my self really since Aron said that I haven't been there for him, I never thought that I did that to him. I thought things were fine and that we were all getting along. I can't lose Aron, I can't. He's been here for me since I found out I was sick, maybe that's why he feels he's left out. Because he's always been there for me and lately I haven't been there for him. Maybe that's why he's upset, I have to fix this.

"Dad, where's the keys?" I ask my dad as I go into the kitchen, Harry's at work so he doesn't know I'm doing this.

"Why sweetie?"

"Dad please I just need them." I say and he pulls them from his pocket and hands them to me. I go out to the car and head over to Arons house, in a way I'm hoping he's not there just so I won't have to see the hurt I've caused him. When I arrive his car is where he parks it, I get out of the car and go to the front door and knock.

Aron opens the door and sighs, he just looks at me as I look at him. He then motions his head for me to come inside.

"Aron can we talk please?"

"Everything okay?"

"No, it's not. I realized I'm excluding my best friend and I don't like that."

"Melanie, I'm sorry I was mean -"

"No Aron, you don't have to say sorry I do. I was being a horrible best friend by not being there for you and by leaving you out. I'm so sorry Aron and I can't say that enough." Aron sighs and looks to the floor, he puts his hand on his head and just sits there for a minute before looking back at me.

"Why did you come here."

"What? I wanted to apologize to -"

"No, why are you here?"

"Because I don't wanna lose you, Aron." I say and I feel my eye's start to water, a few seconds later a tear falls down my cheek and Aron smiles and whips it with his thumb.

"I don't wanna lose you either Mel, but you being with Harry makes it difficult for our friendship."

"I can fix it though, I can make sure that I'm there for you more and make sure that you never feel left out."

"Mel, it's just not going to work."

"Aron, please we can do this please."

"I won't."

"What are you saying?"

"What I'm saying is that, it's him or me." What? He can't make me choose, no he can't do this.

"Aron what? You can't make me choose between the two of you. I won't do that."

"I guess that's your answer then."

"You can't expect me to do that though."

"Just leave Melanie." He's not even looking at me, I get up and walk over to the front door.

"You know, I always thought we would never have to deal with something like this. That no matter what we would always be there and we'd never end our friendship. But I was wrong, I should've known that I live in a wold where things don't last forever." With that I walked out the door and too the car. The drive home was rough, I was crying so hard that I could barley see the anything.

I get home and Harry was here, he wasn't suppose to be home for a few more hours. He see's that I have been crying and I explain what happened. I can tell he's angry from what Aron said, but there's nothing I can do.

I won't choose between them, it would be wrong and I'm not losing either one of them. I mean yeah he may think I chose Harry over him but I didn't, I didn't choose either one because I shouldn't have to choose. If the roles were reversed, he wouldn't be able to choose between me and his girlfriend and I wouldn't even make him choose.

Weeks have passed and I still haven't heard from Aron, nor have I tried contacting him. Mom and dad have let the "I miss Aron being here" sentence a lot but the apologize afterwards and I just shake off what they say. I'll be honest, I miss him too but I'm not losing my boyfriend over him.

"You ready sweetie?" My mom asks as she walks into my room.

"Yeah I am." Today I'm going to the doctor to see if the chemo is working. Everyone is staying positive and saying it's working but I've always known whats really happening. I know that it probably hasn't been working, Harry has been trying to keep my positive but it's just hard.

He's meeting my mom and I at the doctors, he's leaving work early to meet us. We get there and he's standing at the front door waiting just like he told me he would be. He kisses me and we walk in and sit in the waiting room.

"Melanie, the doctor is ready for you hunny." The nurse says and we all walk back together to hear the dreaded news.

"Hello Melanie, how are you feeling?" Dr. Riley asks.

"Well, I'm alive."

"She's doing great is what she means." My mother says and Dr. Riley nods with a fake smile.

"Well I won't waste anytime getting to these results, you've been doing chemo for a while and we knew when we started this last night that it could either work or worsen or it could just be stabilized." Even though he says he'll get right to it, he never does.

"So what's the results say then? No point in wasting time right?" I say and again he nods, no fake smile this time. He opens my file and let's out a sigh.

"It appears that, the treatment didn't help this time. It's not stabilized and it's not any better or worse. But it didn't help."

"So what are our options?" My mom says with tears falling down her face. Harry is trying to hide his my I can hear his sniffles and the grip that he has on my hand is tighter.

"Well, there are different treatments we could do, possibly another surgery to help at least some with the infected area. But as you know that's no guarantee, I would suggest we do another treatment and see how that works and if it doesn't help-"

"Then what? We could just pull the plug now or I could live as long as the cancer will let me. Which would you recommend?" I interrupt and my mom and Harry both give me a look telling me to stop.

"I was gonna say, that we could keep trying. Melanie I'm not going to let the cancer win, but you also have to help with that. This negativity isn't helping at all, you should be staying positive so that way things won't be as scary for you."

"I'm not scared, I've accepted the concept that I'm going to die."

"Your not going to die Melanie." Harry says.

"He's right, your not. I'm going to make sure that you love a long happy life and that you get everything you deserve in this world just like everyone else." Promises should never be made when they are constantly being broken. This is a never ending broken record thing for me, we've tried several different treatments and none seem to work. Other than the time when I was younger and we thought it was gone, but we were wrong. We usually are when it comes to this stuff.

Hey everyone! sorry it took me so long to update! But I thought I'd go ahead and post this for you! How amazing is the Steal My Girl video?!?!?! How many times have you watched it?!?!!? I lost count but I'm going ahead and posting this chapter since it's been awhile! Hope you enjoy ! Love you guys!! xxx