Salted Wound

Chapter 8 Zamari

Aug. 31, 2018

The shrill ringing of the phone jerks me out of the doze I had been.

    "Jade! Phone!" I call, too lazy to get up and answer it myself.

    She comes in the room muttering about my lazy ass as she picks up the receiver.

    "Hey. dad," I hear her say, and roll my eyes, thankful it wasn't me who answered. I would have hung up.

    "Zamari? Let me check,"

    I peer over the top of the couch and mouth, "I'm busy."

    She rolls her eyes, motioning to my current state, wearing boxers and sprawled on the couch with a bag of chips as my company, but she doesn't betray me as she answers him.

    "Um, he's busy with schoolwork right now, why?"

    I tune out of the conversation, focusing back on the nature documentary on TV that I had been too lazy to turn off, then became too interested in to ignore. Jade hangs up after a few more minutes chatting and sits on the arm of the chair near my feet.

    "Dad wants to know why he hasn't seen you lately. Amari and I stopped by not that long ago, but he wants you to go visit him and Jenny,"

    I snort with derision at what sounds like a fate worse than death. "I'd rather shower with a bear," Jade gives a thoughtful face, most likely picturing the spectacle.

    "Seems an unlikely pairing, you with a bear, but whatever floats your boat." 

    "Long as she treats me right, I don't care her species," I say, still watching the nature documentary about the life of bees.

    "I can't imagine a bear treating you right in that sense," she comments, before turning back to the train of thought we'd abandoned at the metaphorical station. "Really, Zam, I know its a lot, but you should stop by, have lunch with them." She hastens to continue when she sees the tortured look on my face. "Look at it this way, if you do, you'll be able to order the most expensive thing on the menu without feeling guilty. And it'll get mom off your back,"

    "What do you gain from inflicting such pain on me?" I ask.

    She shrugs "I just want to be able to see him without feeling guilty."

    "That's on him for leaving, not me for pointing it out," I reply sharply. It's not my fault he found a woman who could offer him a do-over on the whole family thing.

    "I know Zam, I know," she says, her tone quiet. "I miss him though. Don't you?"

    I don't answer, partially to spare myself the pain of attempting a description of my opinion and partially because I honest to God don't know the answer. After an extended silence, I finally agree.

    "I'll go to lunch with them, but it's on you to tell him. I'm not gonna call him and spend lunchtime with him too."

    Jade finally smiles. "Thanks, maybe it'll work out better than you expect."

    I doubt that.

___________________

Sep. 4, 2018

    I stare out the window at the trees we pass, my silence serving as a reminder of how much I don't want to be here and Mom doesn't bother trying to bring me out of my stony mood. I'm being forced into this meeting by a nagging sister and an overly hopeful brother, amongst which I'm the only one who seems to realize that we're on our own. The further from home we get, the more alien the surroundings become, belonging to a life no longer mine, in a neighborhood I no longer claim.