A Lie Is A Lie (Niall Horan)

14. Celebrations

Just look at the side photo. He's so.. asdfghjkl! He is just GORGEOUS! I could go on forever about my little leprechaun, but here's the next chapter :)

5 Minutes Ago...

It got awkward after the movie finished. I don't know why. MAybe it was the sexual tension in the air. Niall offered to drive me home and I replied instantly. I couldn't stay their any longer due to how awkward it was. The car ride wasn't even good. The was silence, nothing more. Only breathing. I think since I turned him down for sex, it got weird. But it's funny because I've never been in a situation like this therefor I don't know how to act or approach the topic of asking him about it. After driving for what seemed like miles, he pulled up outside the curb of my hotel. We need to say something don't we? If I'm ever going to leave. "Savannah, has it been awkward?"

"Yes. Look, it's been awkward since we were almost gonna have sex,"

He had the face of a child who had jsut been told that grandma died. He had upset, confusion, relief and wonderment in his face all at the same time.

"Look, Niall, I care about you more than anyone and I know we're not virgins..."

Huh, little does he know I'm a fucking nun.

"...but I need to wait,"

It's true. I've been saving for him for such a long time. He's a reason why ive never kissed any other boys or gone out on dates, I've been waiting for Niall to be  my first everything. And he has. When it comes to my first time, I want to be comfrotable, ready, in a good place and just safe. Safety is what concerns me. What if the condom breaks? What will happen?

"Why? If you do care about me, why do you want to wait?"

"Because I'm scared!" I cried out to him.

I think this is one of the most honest things I've said to him. Saying something like that made me feel like I was being myself with him. I have a theory of happiness. When you find happiness, you never want it to go. Being happy makes a part of who you are. Sure, I'm a lier and I'm not completley happy doing this, but I felt like nothing else was wrong with the world.

"You're scared?" He finally asked me.

"Yes. Normally with any other guy I'd jump at it. But...your special to me. Your not like any other boy i met. I'd like our first moment to be unique and I'm scared it'll be bad. With other guys, I'm not comfortable when we do it and I'm scared we'll be the same. I'm also scared of what'll happen after. How it'll change the relationship between you and Rosie,"

"Savannah... no matter how long I have to wait, how many times I urge to have you, even if I am 42 and you still don't want to, I'll wait for you. Because you are worth waiting for,"

No boy has ever told me I'm worth waiting for. I've turned down dates and all the boys get pissed. I turn down giving him sex and he's fine with it. So this is what genuine guys are like.

"Really?"

"Yeah. And there's something that I should do,"

"Savannah Tomkins, will you be my girlfriend?"

And that is my definiton of happiness. Having a complete joy go to your heart and feeling weak in the knees happy. Head over heels. Smitten.This boy is my cup of tea, he is wonderful. I had to say it. I'm gonna do it.

"Yes," I reply. "I'll be your girlfriend,"

Now