Hayatii (Unedited)

8

Zara's pov.

Well its Monday again. I watched mum dress my wound while she blew it air from her mouth with almost a teary eye. If my mum was still alive.... would I ever received the kind of love mum zeena shower me with? would I have known her?

"Mum zeena I told you it's not hurting that much" I said softly not wanting to look in her eyes. Her tears were my weakness.They made me helpless.

"You keep fighting with people, I don't know whats wrong with you exactly" she muttered fixing a plaster on my arm.

"What is wrong with them exactly?!" .....
"What was that?!"  mum said almost smacking me but I dogged. I didn't just say my thought out loud.

**********

Time went by @ school steadily and peacefully. I received constant glare and some whispers of what I wasn't interested in. I kept receiving bunch of letters and get well soon cards which I didn't care to read. I don't have the vibe to even read the letters of my four letter name please. I had no positive energy towards anyone's trouble.
Humaira kept stocking me with some stupid maths question during break time... how does this girl do her thing? Book worm. Thaa

I violently dug into the apple mum zeena put in my bag pack while a strong but mild scent appeared towards me. No trouble Zara...no trouble...No. I kept repeating in my head till I heard a husky unfamiliar voice.

"Maira" he said almost in a whisper . It was her twin brother jafar. He wasn't the drama guy, he hardly speaks to any1. I slowed chewing on my apple I grabbed with my  two hands. Humaira raised her head from her book while her glasses sagged down the brige of her nose then she turned to him with a pout. He sat besides me...how dare he...No trouble Zara! Calm...

"Whatt?.."she asked her twin brother dumbly while raising her brow after stressing the last letter on the word.

"Why can't you just fake been nice?" He said quite not impressed by his sister while she shrugged.
They kept their petty useless convo while I got lost in my thoughts...... I wish I had a sibling. I don't even have a dad.... what would having a dad look like. The scenario of my mother telling me to run was still fresh in  my head. Was she really gone? Where was she burried and who burried her?. I was caught off my thought by the sounds of the bell indicating the Break time was over. I looked besides me and their was no jafar on his seat but my bag slightly open. Humaira was a little upset while she hastily solved her maths problem while I looked at her impressed. She was upset and fast, drawing digits like a doctor late for a surgery. Humaira was complete opposite of me.....she was fair, gentle, brilliant and hard-working, I didn't just understand how she got stuck with me to the extent of being my friend. My best friend.

I hung my bag over my shoulders while I drew humaira off the chair. She hadn't even eaten any of her snack, I celebrated a little in my head because I know I'll be eating them all.

We part ways with humaira as she had chemistry and I had history when I bumped into someone....sabir of course! I looked at him with rage in my eyes while he smirked..Ya Allah do you really want me to murder someone during my life time?!

Mum zeena won't happy if I got into another fight....and for the first time.....  Xan barshi ya kwana. So I gave him a death glare and left.

History class was boring as ever.. I mean who wants to hear the stories of some bunch of dead guys or the selfish leaders in the government when they were young ..... Hasbunallah, I sigh rolling my eyes.

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I left school late today. Late like the school's normal closing time around 2:00 . I always leave school around 12pm to make it islamiya so that I can steam some scent around and make tilawa before other students arrive.

Humaira & Jafar's driver dropped me at home while I waved my Friend good bye strangely as I start to miss her presence. Ive been considerate about how I feel in situations ever since Amir..Im mean Ustaz Amir shouted on me. I shrugged the thought off as I made my way inside our bungalow.

Usually the scent of mum zeena and what she was preparing for lunch welcomed me back home...but today was different. Only her scent was there. Some thing didn't feel right. I made my Salam & I began to feel uneasy as I shakily inserted my key to the house and turn the door knob. She always welcome me back home from school, pulling me in through the door and examining my body for any new wounds. I chuckled at the thought while my breath began to hitch as I made my way to the kitchen linked to the dining area as my heart beat began to race... "Mum zeena?.... Mum?!"

I found some partially chopped vegetables on the kitchen marble then I trace my sight to the floor.

Alas Mum zeena was lying unconsciously on the kitchen floor with a knife besides her . I flung my bag pack while removing my hijab exposing my jet black curled hair packed at the middle of my head. I knelt besides her shaking her violently telling her to open her eyes.
For the first time in many years I felt helpless and confused. I was ungrateful for having her as I thought about my real parents but I never said I want to live without her Ya Allah!

" Mum wake up" I continued shaking her bathing her face with my tears.

"Wait goje?!" .... I thought loud.
I ran out from the house like some one escaping from the prison finding my way to goje's house bumping into students strolling their way down from school.

"Goje?!" I knocked on his shago

"GO..." Before I could complete his name again he came out almost bumping into me, his shirt half buttoned, trousers sagged, he had no shoes on and a gora in his right hand.

"Sister waye ne ehh?" He said in his coarse deep voice. Seeing me without a hijab and my teary probably swollen eyes triggered worry/ violence in him.
"Wlh talahi ana....." I stopped him before he completed his sentence.
" Mmama....mama ta Suma!"  I blurrted out earning the attention of passers by. I dragged him by his shirt home. We had to borrow a neighbors car or should I say seize the car as they first refused to give us because of goje was going to drive it so we had no option but to show them a weapon.

The drive to the nearest hospital finally ended after a year. I and mum zeena stayed back seat as I made friction on her cold palm.

Within a few minutes a stretcher was brought out to take mum zeena into hospital which was useless because they referred her to the school of medicine teaching hospital in the city and fixed her some oxygen to aid her breathing. They claimed the case was a complicated one not after goje held a knife to one of the doctors throat. I had to pull him away as my mother's life was on the line. Did I just call her my mother?
Local hospitals and drama dou. I thought trying to calm my nerves down

They put her in the hospital ambulance to drive us to the reffered hospital. My heartbeat sync with the sound of the sirren while my grip tightened around my mother's soft protective hand.

The drive took century and it finally ended. They rushed my mother to the emergency ward and ask me to pay some fine....  Money?! Where do I get from?!

I was interrupted in my thoughts as goje came bumping into me with some solid cash at hand while I looked at him puzzled. were did he get all this from....he didn't....

"Its my savings I promise." He said as if he was reading my thoughts.

About an hour of waiting a doctor came outside of the room my mum was.....I moved closer to him and there was something really familiar about the  guy. His name tag read;

Khaleed I.B 

It was then I realized he was the same guy I slammed on a marts table about a week ago.

Zara what have you done?!

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