Night Sky

54

Hobi’s POV

I ran my hand through my damp sweaty hair. My hurried breath and sore muscles are vibrating all throughout my body. I have been in this studio for over 5 hours now and I have ran through different choreographies a million times only stopping to hydrate myself before I pass out. I look at my dishevelled state in the mirror. All I can see is a guy so broken and confused. I walked closer to the huge mirror that is covering the entire wall of this dance studio and let my forehead touch the glass.

“Jung Hoseok. You did not work this hard just to lose focus because of a fucking girl.” I said while lightly tapping the glass with the palm of my hand. I closed my eyes and breathed deep to allow my lungs to breathe in some needed oxygen.

“Fuck. Stop thinking about it, idiot!” I screamed, knowing too well no one will hear me at this time of night. I leaned back, turned around and rested my back on the mirror and slid down on a sitting position. I leaned my head on the huge glass and closed my eyes. The image of Yumi and Namjoon kissing on stage is still crystal clear in my mind. The excited shouts and cheers of not just the fans but my members are still ringing in my ear. I thought I already convinced myself that I’m okay. That I’ve already given up the idea that the only girl I was ever interested in since the start of my career was way out of my league. But hell I was wrong.

That little touch. That platonic hug. That harmless smile. It only took one glimpse of Yumi for all my defences to crumble down. And the lingering guilt that I’ve felt since that fateful day in Japan is invading that hollow space inside my chest again. And it hurts. Why does it fucking hurt? Why does it still hurt?

I hung my head low and forced myself to calm my breathing that is still ragged because of the extensive dance session I punished myself to. The only thing embedded in my brain right now is how Namjoon and Yumi might be reconciling at this very moment. Unpleasant thoughts is plaguing my brain and the only thing I can think of to wipe them away is to exhaust myself into not thinking about them.

My head snapped up in surprise when I hear the familiar ringtone from my phone telling me someone is calling me. I grumbled and tried to ignore the irritating sound. But when it was already the third time the unknown person has tried to reach me, I gave up, forced my tired legs to stand up and made my way to the table where the little gadget sat in solitary. Lonely, just like me.

I looked at the caller ID and instantly got nervous. It’s 10 minutes past midnight and Yoongi hyung is calling me. The said person can’t be bothered when it’s already past his bedtime especially after a tiresome concert so I know I’m in it for some scolding.

“Hyung…” I answered.

“Hobi-ah.” I got surprised by how soft his voice is. “Where are you?” Yoongi hyung never bothers to even send a single text. So it’s surprising for him to find me in the middle of the night unless we’re working.

“Just the dance studio a couple floors down, hyung. Why? Is something wrong?” I answered with the calmest voice I could muster. I don’t want any of the boys to know that I’m still affected by this. It took some time for us to be able to talk about Yumi comfortably when I was around and I’m not about to ruin that.

“I’m waiting in front of your room. You didn’t join us for dinner.” I bit my lip in nervousness. I made up some excuse earlier that Mom and Dad wanted to talk to me over the phone so I didn’t join them for dinner. But who am I kidding, we’ve been living with each other for almost a decade now. We’ve already memorized each other’s way of living and breathing.

“I just needed to be alone for a while, hyung.” I truthfully answered. I heard a small sigh on the other side of the receiver. I can sense how this might be affecting Yoongi hyung. Any extreme emotion, with the exception of what Jesse makes him feel, is exhausting for him. I know that this drama is more than enough to seep through his bones and bother him to the fullest.