Avengers | BTS Crackfic (𝗆𝗎𝗅𝗍𝗂)

0.5 the shoplifter

the mayor had called for them as there had been a shop-lifting at the Seoul Mall and it was reported that the culprit was still in there, considerably shoplifting.

soon they were all dispersed in the shopping mall, searching for the thief.

taehyung and jimin were supposed to look on the ground floor. yoongi and jin hesitantly forming a pair as namjoon had ordered and were searching on the middle floor, while namjoon, hoseok and jungkook were on the look for the thief on the top floor.

"hmm", jimin nodded thoughtfully to himself as he and taehyung strolled, looking for the shop lifter.

jimin suddenly came to a halt and fixed his round glasses, "now taehyung", he turned to the younger and spoke, "if you were a poor man turned down by the society and forced to steal for the welfare of your family, where would you go?"

taehyung tapped his chin, looking at all the shops around him and suddenly widened his eyes, pointing in front of him, "the lingerie store obviously", he spoke thoughtfully.

jimin rolled his eyes and smacked him in the head, "i was talking about THE THIEF, not YOUR HORNY ASS, YOU MF"

taehyung just shrugged in response.

-

yoongi yawned, which could clearly be heard through his mask.

"how can you be sleepy when we're looking for a dangerous criminal?" seokjin raised his eyebrow at the younger.

yoongi scoffed, "dangerous criminal? hyung he's probably just out there wearing some excessive layer of clothing he hasn't even paid for."

"in fact", yoongi added as they continued to look here and there, "i say we let him steal, fuck capitalism."

"you know what", seokjin nodded, "your dumbass is right, let's go get something to eat im fucking starving".

with that, the both of them took off to the nearest McDonalds without telling any of their friends.

-
"im so proud of my team", namjoon spoke as he held up a camera, filming himself as they continued to look, "they're really putting in all their blood, sweat, and tears to save the city from- "

"namjoon hyung?" jungkook cutely appeared in front of the camera, looking at him with his big doe eyes.

namjoon internally cooed at namjoon internally cooed at the younger, "what is it, kookie?"

jungkook just pointed at the McDonalds right in front of them. Namjoon turned the camera to where he was pointing. As the lense of the camera adjusted, it zoomed in on a pair of weirdly-dressed teenagers stuffing food down their throats.

namjoon instantly cleared his throat, "uhM- what about those fine looking gentlemen, jungkook?" he said, turning the camera to himself.

hoseok joined them, squinting his eyes at the sight, "fine looking gentlemen, my ass. that long-haired noodlehead with a hammer is clearly seokjin and that little black kitten's obviously yoongi." he grabbed the camera from namjoon and filmed the two.

namjoon nervously chuckled, "hA HA...."

hoseok shoved the camera into namjoon's face, completely unaware of the fact that namjoon was trying to save himself from the embarrassment, " tell me ironman ," he interrogated like an annoying interviewer, "don't those two look extremely familiar to you? maybe even people you meet everyday?"

namjoon started sweating intensely and took the handkerchief he didnt notice jungkook had handed him to wipe his face, "i- uh -i don't know what you're t-talking about", he stuttered.

"uhh hoseok hyung?" jungkook chimed in, judging namjoon's nervous state " i think you should stop- "

"wHAT ELSE ARE YOU HIDING, NAMJOON??" hoseok dramatically yelled, stepping closer he then whispered in namjoon's ear, "or should i say, camboy? "

the last thing hoseok and jungkook saw was namjoon flying out of the building.

"look what you did, hyung," jungkook sighed and shook his head in disappointment, "God knows where he went and how he must be feeling- "

"oOOH JUNGKOOK YOU WANNA GRAB SOMETHING TO EAT FROM MCDONALD'S" hoseok said excitedly as he filmed jungkook and himself.

"hELL YEAAH"

》_______________《

[namjoon is me. anyways, PLEASE comment something asShOLeS uwu]