Promises Not Kept

36

//Welcome to Season 5, my friends. Hopefully, everyone's had a chance to watch the first episode. If you haven't, I'd advise you to wait to read this chapter until you do. Let the angst commence. 

            "Daddy!"

Tommy smiled and crouched down with his arms open wide. "C'mere, c'mere, c'mere." He scooped Johanna in his arms and kissed her cheek. He passed by the large grave being dug for Dangerous. A grimace quickly settled on his face. "Get 'er done, Johnny." He muttered to the man.

Leah stood up from the vardo steps when Tommy came near. "Everything alright back home?"

"Fine, everything's fine. Where's Charles?"

She sighed and nodded her head to the door behind her. "Won't come out." She lowered her voice. "Heard Johnny talking in Rocka about you shooting Dangerous. I guess he knows more words than we thought. Certainly knows more words than I do."

Tommy groaned and set Johanna down. "Charlie, come out." He called. There was a pause before the little blond-haired boy emerged from the wagon. "Have a seat."

The little boy crossed his arms over his chest and refused to listen. It seemed with every passing day he was becoming more and more like his father. Of course, there were ups and downs to that.

"Look at me."

Charlie pointedly looked the opposite direction and pulled his I'm-Not-Listening face.

Tommy exhaled sharply. "There was nothing we could do, your horse was very sick, he was in pain. Even Curly couldn't help him." He tried to explain in a steady voice. "Sometimes, sometimes." He reached out to grab Charlie's hand. "Sometimes death is a kindness."

Charlie wrenched his hand away from his father and retreated back into the vardo.

"Doesn't fucking listen," Tommy muttered and roughly passed a hand over his eyes. "Never fucking listen." He snarled and stood up. pointing at the door of the vardo.

His wife sighed and touched Johanna's shoulder. "Tommy, please..."

"No one ever fucking listens." He stalked over to the edge of the grave. The sight of the dark horse lying lifeless in the ground made his chest tighten painfully. There was a shuffle of small footsteps beside him. Johanna reached for his hand, wrapping her tiny fingers around his.

Tommy forced a smile and squeezed her hand. "Dangerous, my beautiful horse, too wild to race wouldn't take the reins or the whip. Should have been a warhorse. Got tired of the pasture. Now free." He closed his eyes for a moment. "In the bleak-" His voice gave out and he swallowed back a sob.

Johanna glanced up at him. "You crying?" She asked gently. Being so young, she didn't understand what was going on. Didn't understand that the horse in the ground wasn't just sleeping like her mother had said. Didn't understand that fathers could cry too. She'd never seen Tommy cry before.

"No, love." He cleared his throat and started again. "In the bleak midwinter."

"What's that mean?"

He scooped his daughter up and held her close. "Nothing, Jo. Nothing."

Leah walked over and ran her fingers through Johanna's hair, the same color as her father's. The little girl smiled but it faded. "Why's Charlie sad?" She asked.