Her Broken Heart

Chapter 11

Hi kitties

Vidhi

Why do I want to go back to him even though I know that now our path is just different and he is even ready to come back to me. But my mind is not ready. It is screaming that I will become a traitor of my own friend. I don't know till where this statement is correct. But I had come to attend her wedding not to come over here and to get back with him.

But the more I try to make my heart understand that this and that is wrong. It doesn't listen to me that much. I want this stupid heart to stop beating crazily when I see him. It is really weird that I should have thrown him away but I can't do that. I felt something wet on my cheeks and found a tear. I wanted to cry but I guess I have left with no shoulder in which I can cry out. There is no one in my back who will give me support. My phone rang. I picked it up.

"Vidhi, how are you?" A soft voice hit my ears. My eyes become more teary. I want her now but unfortunately she is not here. Why is she not here? I want her. She is my biggest strength. I wanted to cry out so bad. I bit my lower lips to stop myself from crying.

"Vidhi, are you there?" She asked. I nodded. Even though I know that she can't see me. I don't want to speak as she will find that something is wrong and I don't want her to know that I am sad or else she will be tense.

"I know dear you are there. Are you tensed about anything?" She asked. I shook my head. I know it is time for me to speak. I wipe up my tears and take an invisible sigh. And take a light breath.

"I am fine." The voice which came out wasn't even recognized by myself only. Am I that much hurt?

"Are you okay Vidhi?" She asked and I took the phone from my ear and took it away from my face.

Vidhi control. You are not that weak. Someone can't just remind you about your past. I told myself and controlled it. I take the phone and put it near my ear.

"I am fine. What will happen to me?"I asked her

"Hmm.... But it doesn't look like you are okay. You know that you can share anything with me?" She asked.

"Yeah I know but when there is nothing special then what should I talk about." I said and chuckled a bit.

"Okay if you say. By the way, how are rituals going?" She asked

"Mamma today just had a Haldi ceremony and it was also very nice. I enjoyed it a lot. I was missing you the whole time." I said. It was an honest answer. I really wanted her with me now.

"I too want to be with you dear but after four day here is function and next day I will come to you. I too miss you dear." She said and I smiled

"Will be waiting for you." I said.

"Me too. I just am missing you as hell. Without you the house is so quiet and I like it." She said,

"So you mean that I always create trouble?" I asked her.

"No, I haven't said that yet. I like this kind of environment but I do also want you. Dear just wait. I will come soon." She said and we both laughed.

"Mamma it is getting late. You should sleep now." I said.

"Hmm.... I am guessing you are getting bored of me." She said and I was shocked.

"Mamma don't say those words again. You know that how much you mean to me and getting bored of you is not my option and you just jump on the other solution. I said that because I am worried about you." I said angrily. I was hell angry with her words.

"Come down dear. I was just joking." She said and chuckled.

"Mamma, it wasn't a joke for me at all." I said and she stopped chuckling.

"You are just talking like your father. He also used to shout at me when I used to talk like that." She said and I was hit by his memories. I don't know if I consider myself lucky or not. May I consider myself lucky because at least I have spent 10 years with me or unlucky that he is not here to protect me. I was confused.

"Mamma, I will talk to you later. Goodbye and goodnight. Have sweet dreams." I said and even before she could speak I hung up. My heart was so heavy today. I can't hold this anymore. I took some of my clothes and walked straight to the shower. I didn't even dare to remove my clothes. I just entered the shower. My whole body was getting drench. I slowly slowly started to cry. I was really unable to think where my life is taking me and why I am going away with my life.

I sobbed hard. I am at the worst part of my life. Where I have no one till my eyes can go. My backs have no one anymore. I am feeling weak.

Vidhi, you are such a crybaby. From the death of your father you had always supported your mother. She was also alone when you felt that loneliness. If you are that much weak then you wouldn't be able to hide this feeling inside you. Even though you are feeling weak, remember that there are so many people on your back. Who will never ever leave you. You are just over thinking. My conscience said to me.

My conscience is somewhere right. I am just letting my pain drown me inside it. I stopped the shower and changed my clothes and came outside and didn't think much before going to bed and sleeping.