s o n d e r ☽༓･*˚⁺‧͙

s a c c h a r i n e

s a c c h a r i n e
/ˈsak(ə)rən/adjective1. excessively sweet or sentimental."saccharine music"

if you cannot manage
to do what you say you will
don't lie to yourself

and say its life's bitter pill
to swallow
while i lay in darkness
in pursuit of something
more loving
and less heartless
more me
and less of
you
but oh

don't accuse me of
this homicide of literacy
you held the gun

and i've felt a few kisses like one
the kind that paint me purple, pink, and blue

i was
young and reckless
now i'm sober and i stress less
i'm no longer drunk on you

to live
what a beautiful addiction
but your words are knives
and best believe they pierce every time
so i built a wall between us two
there can be no more pain
no more anything
that's just fiction

you've got your gun
and oh
this
this is final affliction

you say you're living
but i can't see how
i know things have changed
times are different now

but i've grown into something sweeter
i feel more cautious
and my energy is more gentle
more caring
just meeker

but you still sit high up on your pedestal
angry and cold
upset about demons and the future
because it was never yours to control

and would you look at that?
all along i thought you were a rose
my love was, anemone
dark to the core
always angry

i had to be the one to save me
sometimes the memory of you still stings
but you can't ever hurt me
and i don't feel sorry
because i was, and now i don't have to be

now i just feel sweet
just how you remembered me
just how you thought i'd be
just the way you met me