Ineffable Husbands Oneshots

Gabriel the Cockblock

It honestly wasn't Gabriel's fault. He just seemed to have a sense of when the two lovebirds were horny. It had actually became a normal thing, unfortunately. Azi and Crowley would be making out and Gabriel would have an urgent message for the principality. He didn't actually mind the two together, but only because they had blackmail on him. Crowley accidentally walked in on him and Bee doing the deed. The deal was, Crowley wouldn't say a word to anyone else, and they wouldn't stop the other two from seeing each other.

It was a Monday morning when it first happened after the deal. Gabe was only checking in on Aziraphale for report. They had not heard from the angel in a while, so Gabe decided to take matters into his own hands.

Azi was having tea and discussing random thoughts with the demon. The two had been inching closer over the table until they finally met in the middle. It wasn't long before Azi was on top of Crowley, deepening the kiss, hands roaming up under the demon's shirt.

Gabriel had ended up just miracling himself into the tiny kitchen when the moans started. "Good Lord!"

Azi jumped off the blushing, panting mess of a demon. His hair was now ruffled up a bit and he smiled as innocently as he could at his boss. "Good morning Gabriel."

"Um, good morning." Gabriel shuffled his feet uncomfortably. "I was just checking in on things down here."

"Ah, yes. Everything is just dandy." Azi stated, he could have laughed at the other's embarrassment. "By the way. How's Beelzebub doing?" A smirk gracing his features.

"They're fine." Gabriel stated blankly just wanting to leave already.

"That's good to hear." Azi told him.

"Yes, well, since everything is okay, I will be on my way." He gave the two one last look before disappearing.

You might be wondering what Crowley was doing during this exchange. You see, he had been so embarrassed, he turned into a snake and was laying on the chair, head buried underneath his body. Azi burst out in laughter. The mood may have been ruined, but he didn't mind, for now.

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It has been a year since Gabriel had been showing up a lot at the worse times. Sometimes, Crowley and Azi thought he was doing it for revenge. The hilarity of some of the interruptions was fewer and fewer.

Gabriel has stopped the two from going further five times this month. Azi had enough. Crowley didn't mind, at least that's what he says. It was time for their revenge.

After dining at the Ritz, Crowley and Azi made their way to Crowley's flat. Azi knew that it didn't matter where they went, Gabriel only had to miracle himself to Azi.

Throwing open the door to Crowley's room, Azi pulled the demon along. He pushed Crowley onto his back and gave him a lustful kiss. Crowley moaned into the kiss and pushed his needy body against his boyfriend. Azi bit Crowley's lip gently, who in turn allowed the angel to shove his tongue in.

Right on time, Gabriel ended up in front of the two. He silently cursed his luck and cleared his throat. His face red and eyes now looking at a nearby wall.

All he received was a moan, as the two ignored the archangel. He really didn't understand why he always ended up interrupting them. He feels like this is God's punishment for the notpocalypse.

Getting the hint that the two would not be stopping this time, he just left. He would just wait for the angel to come back instead of torturing himself. 'Eventually Aziraphale would come crawling back to heaven.' He thought. Obviously, he was wrong.