OBSIDIAN ISSUE #2 : WOUNDED

TWENTY ONE

I remember when I asked God for eternal rest, I was instead given a second chance. When I tried to gasp for red through a deliberate cut in my veins, I was rather granted with the scars.

Never in my most vile hopes had I ever looked forward to dread an offer with a close call to death, and only after I thought of this did I ever realize that among the multiple attempts I had in the past, this was the very first shot to the edge that had not been caused by the torments of my own hell.

Ang tanging bumabalot sa isip ko ay ang sigaw niya, kasabay ang pagbasak ng mga tuhod sa lupa. Shocked and with my might depleted, force was an abortive attempt when I tried to catch him. He was very much in pain, screaming and sensitive to even the slightest touch. Pinanghihinaan din ako dahilan para tuluyan nang maanod sa kanyang pagbagsak.

Mabilis umaksyon sina Charlie at Vin na pinag-awayan pa ang pagtawag ng ambulansya. Idiretso na lang raw namin sa pick-up at siya ang magmamaneho tungo sa ospital, ani pa ng una. But Davina insisted for the ambulance, never minding what we have just done before the crime.

Iyon din ang ikinakatakot ko pero sa huli, si Vin ang tumapos sa bangayan. Tama rin naman kasi ang punto niya na baka mas ikapapahamak pa ni Angelov lalo't hindi namin alam ang gagawin, dala na rin ng matinding takot at pagkakabigla. With our minds filled with nothing but fear and doubts, we didn't want to risk anyone's life with it. Angelov's life is far more important than us getting caught from our chosen felony.

Namamanhid ang katawan, bawat sulok ay tumitindi ang tibok at nanlalamig ang mga kamay, tinunaw iyon ng dugo niyang mantsa na sa aking mga palad. He was bleeding profusely. I pressed my hand hard on his wound to stop the bleeding. As I watched him suffer, breathing hard while sweat is pooling at the side of his face, it made me look back to those movies where gunshot wounds were just taken so easily. Ngayon ay naging malinaw sa akin na hindi pala totoo lahat iyon.

Because no matter at what depth the bullet delves on a man's surface, gunshot wounds are contingent, if it couldn't be fatal. Either could be a victim or a survivor. Malay ba natin, gaano man kasimple ang tama pero may nadagil palang ugat o buto? Angelov was shot on the left shoulder where the veins directly run and connect to his dominant hand, the left one. Puhunan ang kamay niyang iyon para umukit mapasa papel man o balat.

I can't imagine him losing opportunities because of what we've thought as a simple gunshot. Knowing Angelov, or as how I have known him, mas pipiliin pa nga yata niyang mamatay na lang kaysa ang magtiis at mahirapan sa bawat pagkakataon na papakawalan niya.

"Natamaan ka ba?" Angelov's voice was strained and worn out as he forced himself to speak.

Umiling ako. My loss for words were shared by both shock and the want for his understanding why I chose to be silent instead. Kung hindi ako magsasalita, maiisip niya na ayaw kong makipag-usap kaya tatahimik siya. Hirap na nga siya sa paghinga! Sinubukan pa niyang tumawa na nauwi rin sa ngiwi at marahas na singhap. I pressed my hand harder on his wound.

"Isang tama lang 'to sa braso, hindi sa bungo. I'll survive, hm?" sa nanghihinang garalgal niyang alo.

"Stop talking and just breath, please. Pakibilisan po mauubusan na siya ng dugo!" naiiyak kong pakiusap sa nagmamaneho sa harap.

I am staring at these same hands that have held his blood. Kahit nakaupo na at papaano may nakapagpahinga, sumusuot pa rin ang init sa katawan ko at hindi nilisan ng pananamlay ang buo kong pakiramdam. Kanina, hindi naging madali sa amin ang pagkumbinse sa operasyon para kay Angelov dahil kinailangan pa ng downpayment bago siya i-admit. We almost gave up and look for another hospital until Charlie's father came in and fully paid the expenses. I can almost hear the whole building breathe to life!