OBSIDIAN ISSUE #2 : WOUNDED

THIRTY FIVE

Trigger warning: Violence. Intrusive thoughts.
Eating d/o

Read at your own risk.

"Sam..."

I gasped, quick and harsh when I heard him. Ang simpleng pagsinghap ko ay umalingawngaw na para bang gawa sa konkreto ang pinagkukulungan sa akin. It's beyond me where I am, could be inside my own head or in a dream. Pero isa lang ang sigurado ako, tinatawag ako ni Angelov.

My eyes wandered around to see where his voice could be coming from as it echoes. Adding to my frustration are the drops of water, a sound that reverberates as well. Ngunit sa panay lingon at baling ko, walang ibang bumati sa akin kundi dilim. Kahit ang kinatatayuan ko, hindi na matukoy kung nakalutang ba ako sa itim o nakaapak sa maitim na sahig.

It almost felt like I was trapped inside a void as everything around me paints pure black, like I am standing inside someone else's closed eyes. Not a dot of any contrasting color in sight that could have given me a sign of escape from what seems to be a boundless abyss.

"Sam, dito..."

"Angelov? Nasaan ka?"  Sinimulan kong sundan ang pinagmulan ng kanyang boses.

The echoes of his tortured pleas stretched farther. Ngunit wala pa ring ibang nahahagip ang paningin ko. Pakiramdam ko ay kinukulong ako sa isang bilugang itim at ang boses niya ay nasa labas ng aking rehas. Nevertheless, I didn't stop running. I didn't stop searching for him...

Bumilis ang paghabol ko ng hininga sa mas tumutulin kong takbo lalo nang marinig ang lumalakas na alingawngaw ng mga patak ng tubig at ang daing ng pagdurusa. And the moment I saw his body half lying in the middle of the void, writhing in pure torture, watching me in his tormented eyes, his face twisting in desperation, his hand reaching out... I was caught by the claws of defeat.

It took a great deal of forcing myself to run despite my weak knees. And as I neared to him, the dark walls began to crumble loud and strong until the demolition and the falling debris itself revealed tiled walls. Nagkaroon ng imahe ang lahat ng nasa paligid ko at ngayo'y nasa loob kami ng madilim na banyo. The bathroom that is in his own room inside his old house.

Lumuhod ako sa tabi niya at pinirmi ang kanyang ulo na panay niyang inuuntog sa dingding. Huminto siya at tumingala habang nanginginig ang mga balikat, hindi napigilan na humikbi sa sakit. The sweat and tears on his face were hot burning in my palms as he keeps on wailing in pain, struggling not to scream.

"Sam, ang sakit," habol hininga niyang sumbong, halos wala nang lumalabas sa lalamunang namamaos. "Tulong..." Umiling siya. "Ayoko na, Sam..." Nilamon ng mga hikbi niya ang pangalan ko sa huli.

Unti-unti akong napapaupo sa sahig hila ang kalahating hubad niyang katawan upang ihiga sa aking mga hita. I run my eyes down to his body to check the root of his pain. But instead, what I found under the faintest light was his pale gray complexion, almost translucent, shining, a blinking crystalline as though he's made of dust, a soul, or smoke that swears to fade in any second. Hindi siya napipirmi dahil panay ang pamimilipit na para bang may digmaang nagpangyari sa loob ng kanyang katawan.

"Lov..." my tone melted into sobs.

Gusto kong sabihin na tumigil na pero sa nakikita ko, hindi niya napapaamo ang sarili at lalo na ang dinadamang sakit. 

Hinuli ko ang mukha niya na kung saan saan na bumabaling at ang mga mata'y mariing napapapikit. He's hissing, teeth gritting and sobbing all at the same time. He's a shivering grenade primed to explode seeing the way his body twisted and face distorted in extreme torture.

"Sam...."

I shook my head, thoughts racing on what to do. I felt helpless as he is, but I know he's going through the worst. Ang tanging magagawa ko ay iharang ang kamay ko sa ulo na panay niyang hinahampas sa dingding. Hindi ako nakaramdam ng sakit para sa sarili, sa halip ay sa bawat sigaw at mga iyak niya ay pinipiga ako nang pinong-pino.