Moon picked mates

chapter 39

Alisha POV

Walking naked , I carried the full tray of food into the bathroom with me . I was going to make this work because sitting in a tub of hot water and eating was something I was familiar with. It was one of my favorite things to do beside watching movies while I soaked.  It's killing two birds with one stone am I right?  It helped that the bathtub was one of those sunken kind as I was able to place the tray right next to the tub. Easy access as I soaked and washed.

Sitting the tray down I climbed into the empty tub , quickly plugging it and starting up the hot water.  Leaning against the side I watched the water slowly fill as I began to eat ,I let my body relax as the water covered my body. I didn't even bother to shut it off until it was almost level with the top, it felt that great on my muscles and I didn't want to move.  The heat from the water surrounded me and I finally felt at peace. 

There were shampoos and scented body washes on the side within reach ready for use. I read the bottles as I ate, choosing ones to use after opening each one and smelling them. I didn't like strong smells, it irritated my over sensitive sense of smell.  I never liked strong smells even when I didn't have my wolf present, it's worse now with my heighten senses.

Once the tray of food was almost  gone , I cleaned my body and hair with the lightly  scented products but I didn't want to get out yet. There was still some food left  to snack on and I wasn't ready to leave this room.  I could forget about everything in this little world , nothing existed outside of this bathroom and I could let my emotions go free .  Today had to be one of my worst and best days of my life. Just a few months ago I was so naive about the real world and it was thrown at me suddenly.  Now not only was I part of something supernatural but I was dragged into the seedy underbelly side of life. Not only for shifters but for  humans too, it was a lot to take in and I was still processing it. 

Once upon a time  I was only concerned with finishing  school and getting  a job that would lead one day to me owning my own hotel. Now I just don't know what I'm going to do , my life just got so much more complicated . There was that scandal with Alpha Pussy and his illegal activities, Alvan needed to be talked to and last of all Alpha Lucien who was supposed to be  my mate. 

That was a lot to take in and get sorted out at one time.  Alpha Pussy  I just wanted out of my life either  locked up or dead , I don't care either way. I hope that now things will change at that pack because of this, I'm not sure how it can be done but I know my Uncle will handle it with the other Alpha's here in Europe. 

 Alvan was another matter, I cared about him and I know he feels very strongly about me. I don't want to hurt him but  I needed to let know  him that there wasn't going to be an "us" because I found my mate. But even before that I knew it wasn't going to be forever.

Dealing with him would be the hardest, he had done so much to help me and my friends. I feel bad but I have always been straight with him. I didn't want anything permanent but I can't help but feel like I led him on giving him hope.  I wouldn't stay with someone just because of fear of hurting them or because I owe them something, it wouldn't be fair to either of us. I have to live my life on my own terms.  I  will have to let him down  in person, I wouldn't just call or text him it was over. I owe him that at least.

I sigh as I think of him, there isn't any sense in dragging it out and causing undue pain. Bianca has him with her at her pack in Madrid, he stayed there with the girls once they were notified I was safe. I'm sure he will be welcome here after everything he did to save us , my Uncle expressed a desire to meet him and thank him in person . My uncle won't mind calling the Madrid pack Alpha and asking him to travel here I believe. I'll have to make sure this pack will allow him to come on pack land  first.