Chlorine | Completed

chapter four: confrontation.

camouflage - Selena Gomez.

Chapter 4.

I STORMED into my mother's office, furiously. I slammed the door behind me and she jolted, her pen fell off her hand.

She kept her hand on her chest. "Mabel!"

"What the fuck is he doing here?" I asked, jabbing my thumb towards the door.

"Who – oh! The lifeguard?"

I crossed my arms. "Yes, mother." I rolled my eyes. "The lifeguard."

"He's here to guard lives." She chuckled at her own joke but when I didn't laugh she cleared her throat. "If you've met him, it means you tried to kill yourself, again."

"It's my body mother. I can do what I want to myself. You have no right to tell me what to do."

"I'm your mother," She was raising her voice. "I can tell you what to do. That’s what I do. You think-" She paused. Her voice had become hoarse. She wanted to cry. "Do you think it doesn't hurt me whenever I see you come out of that water, pale and close to death?

"What? Do you think I'm happy that Timothy's dead? Do you think his family – his mother is happy about it?" Before I could talk, she provided the answer. "No! Of course no one is happy about it. But you don't see us try to drown ourselves every now and then!"

"If I want you to tell me what to do, I'll let you. If I need a fucking lifeguard, I'll allow one. If I want to fucking kill myself, mother, I will."

My mother sat down on her chair and ran her hand along her name plate. Tessa Carter, was written on the glass.

"You used to a happy kid, you know," she looked at me. I folded my arms. "You used to smile a lot, used to joke around but I don't know what changed. It's like you were one person yesterday and now, you're different. It's just," She sighed, looking for the word to use.

"I changed?"

Her face lit up. "Yes!" She agreed.

"Well, that's what happens she you lose someone close to you mom," I started for the door but then stopped to face her again. "But you should know all about that, right mom?"

An emotion flashed across her face before she turned the swirvel chair to face the window. "It's not the same, Mabel."

I gripped the door knob. "You could have accepted it mom." I closed my eyes, my voice conveying the sorrow I felt. "He wouldn't be six feet below if you had. You shouldn't have sent him home that night, mom. He will still be alive if you hadn't."

With that I walked out of her office, slamming the door again.

______

Very complicated relationship we have there. Well, that's it for chapter four.

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Much love,

Oyin.