The Female Beatle

16

We all got back to Liverpool and things were going mad. It's been 2 months since the release and everything's gone mad! We've been interviewed on radio shows and in newspapers and Brian has had a call asking for us to head down to London for a photoshoot and BBC interview- crazy right?!
Me and Paul have gone on a couple dates and it's going really well, Paul's great, amazing, stunning! He really is fabulous. He's beautiful as well!
There's only one things and that's that he is out partying a lot at the moment. I know I sound mad and I have talked to him about it- I'm suspicious about his loyalty, I feel as if he's cheating. When we talked, he got really mad at me, called me crazy, stormed out and I hadn't heard from him in days. I never brought it up again. But we're good at the moment. I'm genuinely being mad.
I'm still staying at Brian's- it's great. I feel more at home here than at... home.
I'm so conflicted about home. But let's not think about that.
I'm disturbed anyway by a knock at the door.
"Come in" I shouted. In walked George and John. I haven't seen George unless on "business"- why is he here?
I guess that question was plastered on my face because John spoke up. "Listen we've got to speak to you about something." John looked anywhere but at me but George was the opposite, anyone would thinh it was an emotionless stare- but it felt as if he was having an entire conversation with me.
George has this sort of effect on me. It's mad. Really strange.
It's been a long enough silence to make things awkward. "What then?" I shouted, eager.
"Well um, it's errr... it's Paul." John stuttered.
"What?" I asked only to be greeted with silence. "Tell me!!"
"HE'S CHEATING ON YOU!" George shouted.

"Oh" I answered. I saw John slap the back of George's head and gave him a glare.

I sat down on the nearest sofa and looked straight ahead. I didn't know whether to believe them or not. I had already confronted paul and he was so adamant nothing had happened. I don't think it could have, "I'm sorry Lotty" I heard George sit next to me putting an arm around my shoulders.

"You know we love you Lotty, we saw him last night with this girl and we've seen him with her before and we didn't want to tell you and we're so sorry." John pulled me into a hug but I didn't budge. Instead I stood up and went to get a glass of water. I heard John and George follow my steps and heard them lean against the kitchen door frame.
I tried to calmly put the glass to my lips. As I did, my heart cracked and it tremmered down my body. I collapsed. I sort of crumbled into a ball and sobbed. I felt the boys hold and hug me. Instantly embarrassed I said "I'm not crying because of that, don't feel bad it's not you." I sobbed. "I knew he was cheating. But I can't stop it hurting still." John and George hushed me, George pulled me into his chest and started rocking me back and forth, smoothing our my hairs as he did so. " It hurts because you wouldn't do that to him, the thing that hurts is the faith you had is shattered. Sweetheart, it will get better. I promise."

John must've left, I hadn't heard him. It was just George and I. And I somewhat felt secure.

***Evening

I had dried my tears and was now waiting in the kitchen for Paul. He was due to come over to Brian's and spend the night with me. I had calmed down and decided to confront Paul about it then and there. After I heard him enter the building, I felt my stomach drop and heart rate quicken.

"Hi love" he greeted me, like nothing had changed.
"Paul." I replied, trying to emphasise my disdain for him. He didn't notice but instead walked to the wardrobe shrugging his coat off in the process. "How has your day been?" I asked, lulling him into conversation. He just shrugged and slumped next to me going into leave a trail of kisses on my neck. I could smell the alcohol on his breath and shuddered at his actions, yelling "No!" And standing up away from him. He looked at me incredulously, "what?"
"Is there anything you have to tell me Paul?" I stared at him in the eyes pleading him to reply honestly.
Instead he looked confused and answered "like what".
"LIKE THE GIRLS YOUVE BEEN SHAGGING BEHIND MY BACK!" His eyes changed into a deep emotion of guilt and panic. He started there mouth open, I could almost read his queue of excuses coming up and scoffed at his pathetic pretence. I hold myself in high regard, and I will not be treated like a fool. I scoffed and turned for the door, picking up my jacket. I stopped before I left the room and looked back to him.
"We're done."
He was speechless, and I was out the door.

***
I walked through Liverpool with tears streaking down my face. Determined to not be around people I wondered the streets for a while until I sat on a bench to collect my thoughts. It had been an emotional day and it had dawned on me had stormed out the house in the middle of the night, a young woman on her own, I'm more of an idiot than I thought. A few hushed whispers and footsteps amplified my paranoia- I didn't know if it was my imagination or there was FUCK! Paparazzi had found me and I was bombarded by flashes of light. Without much thought I ran and ran.

I had one destination in mind. George.

I'm back baby.