Nowhere But You

Chapter 33

1995

Robin and River watched the sunset in silence. Her nose was still red from sobbing on and off for the past couple of hours. She had finally come clean to her stepfather Rick that afternoon about the life she had decided to live -not what he had planned for her. It took a lot of her bravery and her energy. She was drained and still fearful. However, this episode also paved the way for her to tell River for the first time that she loved him. He of course had felt the same way for a long time.

Once the ruckus was over, River suggested they'd go to Lake Park to 'clear their heads' as they usually did. They instinctively sat on the same old log by the shore they always chose.

The reflection of the sun washed their faces with an orangey hue.

Robin turned to River with a big smile. "So, when did you know?"

"When did I know what?" He frowned.

"You said I beat you to it." She titled her head, with a cheeky smile. "When did you know you looooooved me?"

"Really?" He chuckled loudly. "Do I have to pinpoint an exact moment?"

She gasped. "I know my exact moment-"

"Oh, do you?" He looked at her wide eyed. "'cause I believe what you said was, 'I think I love you.'" He mimicked her voice.

"Oh my God, that was just a figure of speech..." she laughed, "and anyway, I'm asking you."

River looked back ahead at the horizon and thought back for a moment.

"I know the exact moment I realized you'd be in my life forever... somehow." He said.

"Oh?" Robin was curious.

"The first time I ever saw you was at a Small Death show." He reminisced. "You got your drink spiked that night."

"Wow." She was brought back to an incident she would much rather forget. "That was my first time coming here!"

"I know."

"And," she tried hard, "I don't remember meeting you then, but I must have..."

"You did." He said firmly. "Anyway, I saw you stumbling and then fainting right after we finished our set. Nate ran off the stage and I followed. He was losing his shit and wanted to find the fucker who did it and he was way drunker than I was, so I dragged you both out of there and drove you to the hospital."

"I didn't know any of that." Robin stared at River, holding her breath. Of course, she lost conscience before she could realize any of this had happened and what she could recall from the whole thing was very little.

"Then we got to the ER and it was a fucking mess." River continued. "Soon you were out of my sight but I didn't wanna leave until I was sure you were better..." He sighed. "When I found you guys again they had sedated you or something and you were there, asleep. And this was a Saturday night at the ER, there were tons of people fucking yelling and running but I looked at you and the world got quiet." He looked down and began fiddling with loose strands from a hole in his jeans, almost overcome with shyness like back that night. "Like it was only you and me in that room."

Robin giggled in shock. She wished with all her might she could remember. "I must have looked dreadful-"

"No, you didn't." River cut her off. "Not to me."

Robin smiled tenderly at him and rested her chin on his shoulder. "It's all so hazy..." she said, "I mean, I do remember when I came about. I was super stressed because..." she sighed, "because I didn't want Rick to find out."