TORN

Ellena and The Designer's Clothes

"Know who you want to be. Else you'll become what other people want you to be|Unknown"

[08]

"WOW! ELLENA, You look stunning" I complemented on Ellena's breath taking look as she turns around making circles in the mirror. She giggles happily and turned back to the fitting room for more.

As I sat peacefully at the waiting bench. I watched Ellena being different characters in a minute. Changing outfits and having happy moments with herself.

Three days it's been ever since we joined the gym and she has already lost ten pounds. Wow what an achievement!

"I wish I could lift this whole boutique up and rebuild it back to my house" She wishes wiping a fake tear away.

"You're so dramatic" I laugh at her as she dreams of having the entire boutique all to herself.

"How do I look" She asks for my opinion, turning to me and then back to the mirror.

"I think you look beautiful. You should definitely buy that one" I admired her dress and unzipped it for her.

"Are you sure you took pictures of all the outfits I had on" She asks.

"Of course I did Ellena" I chuckled and slowly cleared my throat. "If you don't mind me asking, what's the use of all those pictures though?".

"Memories" She said.

Shaking my head, I leaned against the wall and blankly gaze at her. "I know you Ellena. There's something you're not telling me"

"Like what" She shrugs.

"I don't know. Maybe you plotting against Charlet secretly?" I pulled my shoulder up.

"Oh Come'on Amber! It's just me. Ellena Peterson " She smirks.

"Doesn't sound like the Ellena I know. You dont have to lie to me you know. I'm your bestfriend. You can tell me anything. Maybe I'll help."

Ellena looked down on her knees. Quite shy but sneaky she cleared her throat. "Ahm. Painful voices spread through my ears each day. Yelling, crowling and shaming me of my undeserving nature. Telling me of things that I'm already aware of. And they think I would just be okay, 'Cause I'm not human enough. Each night I tear myself from sleep with a shiver. Hoping that it would all be over. And wishing that One day I would just wake up from all this nightmares and that would be the end of it. And then I would be free.

I shut my eyes as one shuts an open door. For a moment I tried to understand what she meant but my mind went outright for a second.

"Are you speaking in tongues?" I asked.

"I knew you wouldn't understand. 'Cause I preach a whole different language than you do." Before she could continue, I cut her off. Begging her to get to the point.

"What I was trying to say is that. I found a community that made me feel like home. Where I'm appreciated for who I appear to be and For what I do. "She turns to me and asks, "And do you know what makes me happy the most?"

"Yeah?" I nod.

"Nobody judges anyone as long as you're playing the game right. Each night I look at my profile and sleep with a smile on my face. Knowing that I got thousands of beautiful complements more than I get from the streets. In fact I don't even get any." She scoffs.

"Is that the kind of life you wanna live" I questioned unbelievably.

"Who doesn't want to be happy?" She smiles.

"Ellena you can still be happy being you."

"Who said I wasn't being me. All those designers clothes are owned by me, on me and not anybody else. I'm just living two different lives. Which ever satisfies me at the end of the day, is the one that counts."

Wow. She has become so fearless. The pain that she has endured made her stronger. It changed her from soft like a pillow to hard like a rock. I don't even recognize her anymore. Sometimes I feel like she's not really there, but rather in her own little world.

"Well if it makes you happy, than I'll support you. Just be careful okay" I pulled her in for a hug.

"Really? Would you do that for me?" A tear dropped from her eye lending on my shirt.

"What are friends for" I smirked.

+++

Picking our shopping bags up, we headed back to the car. Changing into our gym atires and joining Ashanty at the sat ups.

"Guys what took you so long" Ashanty whined

"Parenting duties" I joked, exchanging glances with Ella.

"Girl you got time" She rolls her eyes.

"Shxt our trainer is here! Get down on the mat" I yelled.

"Ladies let's start with the warm ups first. Amber into your position and Ellena I'm gon need you to catch up with the rest today honey." We both nod. "Okay let's go. One, two, three...." And so the counting continues.