Fragments of A Soul

thunderstorms

a/n: hope you enjoy this poem :") i have no idea what this is about actually i just wrote whatever came to mind.

also, it has been sitting in my drafts for 2-3 months oops about time i posted this and stay safe everyone!

... 

dark clouds, lightning, thunder, then a heavy downpour.

you stand there, knowing that the rain would make you sick, but there's something that's holding you back and you can't move. nor can you ditch your shoes and run for shelter - all of you is glued to the ground.

the rain had some kind of poison. it poisons my lungs, making me lose oxygen completely, leaving me gasping for air. i panic and try to breathe, but those demons squeeze my throat and cover my nose. i can't breathe.

the rain had some invisibility powder. it's like i'm trapped behind some soundproof glass door, where no matter how loud i scream no one ever hears me. every single passing person who look through me, and not look at me, tightens the black yarn that is wound tightly around my heart.

oh, my heart. my heart feels so heavy. it's like i'm carrying so much in it, when actually there's nothing to carry. yet, it feels like the string tightens again and again, and who knows when the string will squeeze the life out of me?

can you imagine how painful, how alone it is to live this life?

i'm honestly not sure how long i'd hold on. when will this kill my body or my soul?

wait.

i look down at my once-pale body. on my  pristine white skirt, was a huge patch of dark crimson. i stared as the patch grew bigger and bigger.

strangely, it felt like the string in my heart had loosened, my lungs were no longer clogged up and i could breathe normally again.

oh, so this is what normal feels like.

the thunderstorm around me stopped, making way for rainbows and clear blue skies. why am i feeling so peaceful now? maybe it has something to do with the blood flowing out of me. i feel so calm, so at peace.

if this is what peace feels like, i like it.

i uncurled myself from the scared ball i was once in and lay down on the glass floor. the once hard floor felt like soft duvet and feathers. maybe i was just tired.

tired of life, that is. and tired of missing peace and quiet.

i didn't care if my life essence was being drained out of me. if it meant peace, so be it.

i raised my arm to reach for the rainbow, then felt as if i was being lifted off the ground and up into the sky.

i was holding the hands of an angel, and we were making our way up.

into heaven.