Broken Lantern

Chapter Thirty-Two

When we leave the restaurant, we leave different than when we walked in. We're bonded a little more, sharing something so intimate, and so life changing, we all feel older, more mature and just closer somehow. Even me and Jess hug before we part ways. For a split second, I hear Darry laughing at us; two girls that were at each other's throats not too long ago, now hugging and promising to get together to go over venue ideas and wedding decorations. I can't help but smile at the thought.

"You know Darry's up in Heaven happy with us right now." I say to her, a half smile on my face. "I mean look at us, making wedding plans together. What a change a year makes, huh?" I tease her.

"Yeah, definitely", she says, grabbing my elbow and moving me away from the rest of the group. "Look, I'm really sorry for how I treated you before. I was a real jerk, Alice. You didn't do anything to deserve that, and I really hate that we lost all that time because I couldn't get myself straight. I love you, you're one of my very best friends... no, my sister. But if you tell anyone I said any of that, I'll find you and kill you." She says, smiling at me and then hugging my neck.

"I love you too, Jess. I'm so glad we're sisters."

Kevin comes over and puts his arm around my shoulders, kissing the side of my head. "You over here trying to steal my girl away or what?" He says to Jess, winking at her. "Eat your heart out, Kevin Jones!" She says and turns to sashay away over to Joel.

"What was that about?" Kev asks me as we walk to the car.

"Oh nothing, just wedding stuff, babe", I say and look back at Jess, who smiles and nods at me.

"You're so beautiful, Alley. I'm so lucky that you love me." He tells me, unexpectedly. His expression very serious, but soft.

"Wow, thank you. But I'm the lucky one, babe. I'd be lost without you." I assure him, snuggling into his chest as he embraces me, pulling me to him.

"I think we're all lucky", he says, smiling over my head at our friends now getting into their own vehicles, ready to drive off together.

And I have to agree.

It's not often you find love in this life; not real - honest to God, overwhelming, all consuming, passionate love, but luckily, we all have. And I was lucky enough to find it twice.

For a fleeting moment, I catch a glimpse of an emotion that I haven't had since I was a child; like I'm seeing the world through new eyes and I can feel the magic in the air, all over my skin, running through me, leaving behind a sudden jarring electrical current that runs through my veins, making my head feel all tingly.

I get into the car as Kevin opens my door, feeling oddly at peace with myself, with him, with everything. There's nothing negative, no bad thoughts or lingering painful emotions; just love and warmth, adoration and respect, calm and a peacefulness deep in my heart that I haven't known in so long.

"I can't wait to get home to see Dallas", I tell Kevin as he sits next to me. He looks at me and smiles as he pats my knee.

"Me too, babe, it feels like we've been away from her for days, doesn't it?"

I nod in agreement and wonder to myself what that's about. We were both so eager to have a night out and now we can't get home fast enough.

We kiss her cheek and finish packing for our trip. I don't know how we'll manage to be away from her for a whole three days, it's going to be tough.

"We'll have to video chat with her, you know?" I mention to Kevin while we're shoving socks and underwear into our suitcases.

"Yeah, I know. This is going to be hard. Three days away, and not just away from her, but states away, is going to be impossible." He says, walking over to rub her back. She squirms and we look at each other with the fear of God on our faces. "Don't wake her up now", I whisper. "I've got to get some sleep before our flight tomorrow!" I scold him.

The next morning, we wake up early with an hour to spend playing with Dally. She's in an especially chipper mood, laughing and falling back on the floor so she can put her toes in her mouth.

"What are you doing there, little one?" Kevin asks her, lifting her back up to a sitting position and propping her against a pillow. "You don't have to eat your cute little toes, we can afford to feed you mushy bananas and custards, ya know?" He tells her and laughs as she shifts her body, making herself fall back again and sticking her toes right back into her mouth.

"You're so silly!" I tell her, tickling her belly, listening as her sweet laugh fills my ears.

The front door opens, and Jess and Joel come walking into the livingroom. "Morning" Joel says as Jess groans and without saying a word, plops down, laying her head on a pillow, pulling her legs into her chest. "She's still half asleep", he says, nodding toward his now snoring fiancé laying on our couch. "She's no good before 10am lately."

We all laugh, and Joel comes to sit on the floor with us. "We are very grateful to you two for staying with her. I was going to try to do this on my own, but I don't think I can. I need Kev with me." I tell them again, as if they haven't heard this same speech over and over the past two days, while I try to convince myself that this is ok, we are doing the right thing by leaving our child here and not putting her on a plane.

"It's ok, Alley. I promise that we've got this. And tonight, Matt and Britt will be here too. I think the four of us can handle her and your parents are right there", he says pointing toward my parents' house.

I nod and hug him, thanking him again. Kevin stands up and reaches for my hand, "I think we should get a move on, my dear. We don't want to miss our flight."

He helps me to my feet, we kiss Dally one last time before we head out the front door, listening to Joel talk sweetly to her, playing on the floor with her. He's a great Uncle to her. I feel anxious leaving her, but I know she's in good hands. And when Jess wakes up, she'll have even more love showered on her.

We load the trunk of my car and drive off toward the airport, me holding the tiny little urn of Darry's ashes in my lap.