Selfish.
I felt that for a brief moment.
My youngest gave me a hug and said,
"I love you, mommy."
"I love being with you."
I hugged her and smiled.
I love my kids to death.
However, I feel like I'm poison to them.
I know that it doesn't make sense.
I feel like there's two of me.
One half is willing to ride out the storm and try to keep my head floating above water.
The other half is over it.
It has already drown.
So, it wants to do whatever it can to leave here.
People worried about my soul being damned if I were to succeed in my suicide.
However, they fail to understand that I feel like it's damned already.
They just can't see it.
The best way that I can describe it is:
When you see a movie trailer that looks good; but the movie is straight up trash.
You reflect on what you know of me, but you don't know the damaged part of me.
YOU ARE READING
Letters To Myself
Ngẫu nhiênIn this book, I share my letters that I wrote in a notebook. Each letter expresses my raw emotion and it isn't in chronological order. It's an ineffective way to get my thoughts out, although it never left. I wanted to share my emotional rollercoas...
