𝐈𝐭'𝐬 𝐀 𝐁𝐢𝐠 𝐁𝐚𝐝 𝐖𝐨𝐫𝐥𝐝 (𝑾𝒊𝒕𝒉𝒐𝒖𝒕 𝒀𝒐𝒖)

Chapter Eighteen: Dress Code My Ass

Another month had rolled by, it's been good, Costia had gotten the memo and didn't bother me and Lexa's again, we'll when we were together at least, she would go to Lexa when she was alone but Lexa handles the bitch well ending with it making Costia walk away fuming.

Raven had also gotten to walking around on her brace, sometimes she still uses a crotch to make it around and there had been many sleepless nights where I had stayed up with her breaking down but she's getting there and I've never been more proud of her.

Lexa and I have been great as well, we've grown closer than ever and all of us, Lexa, Anya, Raven and myself have been purposely leaving Octavia and Lincoln alone, it's clear they both like each other so we're all trying to get them together, they make a cute couple but Bellamy, Octavia's older brother, is supper protective and one of Lincolns best friends so we don't say anything to him.

"Clarke!" My name being called gets my attention, my history teacher, Mr Pike, stands at the front of the room with his arms crossed looking pointedly at me, I raise a single brow.

"How may I help you, sir?" I ask once I had pulled the watermelon flavoured lollipop out of my mouth with a smirk, my attitude at school had changed, I no longer flirted with anyone and everyone, I didn't start fights and I didn't push people around (much) anymore, although my attitude towards my teachers hadn't changed, the only teacher I got along with was Miss Nixie, she was my art teacher.

"No food in class and your bra strap is showing, that's a violation of the dress code. Office. Now" he tells me grouchy, I bite into my lollipop and glare at him.

"Excuse me? You're sending me away because my bra strap is showing?!" I start, leaning forward in my chair, "Ohh no, the boys must be terribly distracted, a nineteen-year-old, wearing a bra, no one would have ever seen that before!" I put on a manly voice"Omg I think my cocks went hard and the thought if that thin lace that's showing, I can't get anything done if she didn't have that strap nothing would distract me, absolutely nothing!" I growl I've always hated dress codes and everyone knew it.

"MISS GRIFFIN, YOU WILL GO NOW. ITS A DISTRACTION FOR THE BOYS, ITS LIKE YOUR ASKING FOR IT!" Pike yells, in a split second my composure snaps and my fist collides with his jaw then my foot rams into his gut, sending him to the floor.

"ASKING FOR IT!?! BECAUSE MY BRA STRAP IS FUCKING SHOWING!?!WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU ASSHOLES. INSTEAD OF TEACHING GIRLS TO COVER THEIR BODIES SO IT DOESN'T LOOK LIKE THEIR ASKING FOR IT, TEACH THE FUCKING BOYS HOW TO KEEP THEIR COCKS IN THEIR PANTS AND THAT GIRLS AREN'T SEXUAL OBJECTS AND A BRA STRAP, SHORT SHORTS OR ANY OTHER CLOTHING IS NOT ASKING FOR IT, ITS HOT, IM WEARING FUCKING SHORTS!!" I yell at him, shit like this, when people say I'm 'asking for it' or when they don't understand or refuse to understand that 'no' means fucking no, is held close to me.

7 Years ago: Age 13

"WHERE THE FUCK WHERE YOU, YOU LITTLE BITCH!!???" Miss Quinn yelled at me, "IT'S NEARLY ONE IN THE MORNING! I TOLD YOU TO BE BACK BY SIX YOU LITTLE SHIT!" she yells at me.

Phoebe Quinn, a thirty-four-year-old foster parent who just used me for the money, she was a real bitch and super fucking strict, I was sent to her after my last foster family (Who were one of the six foster families that actually were pretty nice and never hurt me) couldn't afford the care I needed anymore.

"WHY THE FUCK WOULD I WANT TO COME BACK HERE TO YOU!?!" I screamed at her, this was an all too regular occurrence here.

She opened her mouth to tell again before she looked at my clothes, it was the middle of summer so I was in short shorts and an oversized tank top, the top was wet from my bikini under it, I had been at the beach.

I take a step back when I see the sinister smile on her face.

"Now you're just asking for it you little slut" she sneers, I cried that night until there were no tears left do shed.

I didn't know it then but Phoebe Quinn would be my last foster mother ever, the next day I would meet Raven Reyes and she would change my life for the better.

Present

I breathe heavily when I'm brought out if my thoughts, my hands are shaking and my forehead covered in a thin layer of sweat, everyone was looking at me, no one but Pike was in shock, they'd all seen my fights with the teacher before so it wants new but for Pike, I doubt someone had the balls to actually do that to him before.

I let out a shaky breath and try to calmly grab my bag and left the classroom, as soon as the door closed behind me I made a beeline for the bathroom, I check to make sure it's empty before locking the main door with a hairpin and let the tears fall down my cheeks as I look into the mirror.

My eyes meet dull grey ones, the blue spark had faded long ago and I don't think it will ever come back, strands of my hair were stuck to my sweaty forehead, my hands shaking and knuckles white from where I was holding onto the counter with a death grip, my breathing erratic as tears roll down my cheeks.

I didn't know who this person was, she was a complete stranger to me but a stranger I still knew too much about, I saw her every morning in the shower, in the mirror or in the reflection of people's eyes, but I didn't know her.

I didn't know why she took over me, why she's so loved, why she even has friends and I didn't know why she was ever created.

That's a lie, I did know.

She was made out of the pieces of a broken little girl who had to learn to stand up for herself because no one would fucking do it for her.

As I looked into that mirror I wanted to die, I needed it, I craved it, even if it was just for a second.

You see, even the smallest triggers set me off, whether it be loud noises or mentions of something, my past always haunts me.

In my life, I had tried to commit suicide three times, once when I was ten by running in front of a car and the other a few months later when I jumped off of my two-story roof, both of them I had passed out on impact, the last one was when I was fourteen and Raven found me with my slit wrists, she didn't pressure me or make me promise her anything, knowing a promise will do shit to help me but she promised she'd be there for me and that's what I needed.

A knock on the door cuts me out of my trance, "Are you ok?" Comes a voice from the other side, I wipe my eyes and grab my bag before opening the four, the councillor on the other side.

Great.

She smiles sweetly at me, "Is everything ok Clarke?" She asks, I nod and push past her.

"Just peachy," I say as the bell goes, I head off to math class.

I'm called into the office an hour later.