101 Letters Unsent. Ziall.

Number Six

" Zayn I'm going to the store okay? And I have to do something with Liam and Harry. Will you be okay? " Louis asked me. I was curled up on my bed. I just nodded. " Alright. I'll be back in a few hours. " he kissed my head and left.

Louis had been promising me that e would stay over here every night after last night. He didn't want me to try again and he tried to make me promise but I told him that I couldn't promise. He understood but told me to try my hardest. I told him I would try. So now here I am. Alone again. In my house.

I sat up and walked over to my desk and started to write.

Niall,

It's getting harder and harder each day Niall. Waking up without you there. Waking up knowing everything isn't just a dream. Waking up to wanting to die everyday. I don't like it Niall.

I also don't like that Logan, Ed's ex boyfriend, said that Ed was cheating on him with you. I don't understand why still. Sure I'm not perfect or anything. But did you really have to cheat on me? Especially when I wanted to propose? Why?

I was going to propose. Very soon after we finally went all the way but you just left. It killed me knowing I got that ring for nothing. It even had words engraved on it.

'Zayn+Niall=Forever.'

That's what it said. I just have to live with reminders everyday because of everything now reminds me of you. We've done so much together Niall.

Why did you have to leave me all alone in this cruel world?

-Zayn.

After putting it in my drawer, I grabbed my sketch pad and pencils from underneath it and began to draw. I drew Niall without even looking at a picture. After I got the outline right I decided that I would finish it.

It must've been an hour or so since I started drawing. I just finished the picture of Niall and looked at it. I smiled. I actually smiled. I taped it to my wall and walked into my bathroom. Grabbing the knife that never left the floor yesterday, I slid it across my wrist once. I watched as it bled out and then washed it off just as Louis' car pulled up.

I walked over to my bed and laid down just staring at the picture I drew. It was a good picture. Probably the best I've ever drawn. I heard footsteps and then Louis appeared in my room.

" Hi Zayn. " he said with a slight smile.

" Hi Lou. " I said back. I went back to looking at the picture.

" Did you draw that while I was out? That's really good. " he complimented. I smiled which caused him to gasp.

" What? And thanks by the way. "

" You're smiling! It's the drawing isn't it? " I nodded. Might as well tell him I cut again.

" Oh and I didn't just draw. " I told him.

" Then what did you do? " he asked confused.

I lifted my arm up and showed him the new bandage on my wrist.

" At least it was only once right? " I nodded and he sat next to me.

" Why did he leave Louis? " I asked him suddenly wanting to cry again.

" I don't know Zayn. I just don't know. " he sighed. I leaned against him and silently cried into his shoulder until I fell asleep.

'You make me Smile like the sun.

Fall outta Bed.' My phone was ringing and I reached over to grab it. I put it up to my ear and that's when I realized Louis wasn't here anymore.

" Hello? " I said into the phone. I looked around a bit but didn't find anything. " Louis!? " I yelled to see if he was here.

" Hi Zaynie. " I heard a very familiar voice fill the phone.

My eyes grew wide as I recognized her voice a few seconds after.

" Hey...... "