101 Letters Unsent. Ziall.

Number Nine

I didn't want to wake up because while I was asleep, everything was a dream. Everything that happened didn't. I still had Niall and we were happily married with two children.

Angie, who was 6. And Darren who was 13.

I have to open my eyes but I don't want to. I keep hearing Louis saying Niall's name to Harry and Liam. I want to go home so much. I just want to get out of here.

I let my eyes slowly pry themselves open as everything in the real world appeared. I sighed to myself as I looked down at my limp arm. I'm still mad I couldn't move it. Louis looked at me and smiled. I just looked at him. His smile instantly fell and he pushed through Liam and Harry to walk to me. They turned around and watched Louis walk towards me.

" Are you okay Zayn? " He whispered as he sat down next to me. Harry and Liam dragged chairs up beside my bed as I replied to Louis.

" I don't want to wake up. Why do I have to wake up? " I asked him looking him dead in the eyes letting him know I was serious about the question.

" I don't know Zayn. Just look on the bright side. The doctor said you were probably stable enough to leave today but your arm has to stay out of use for a while. " he told me.

" Get me out of here! " I demanded.

" We'll go get the doctor. " Liam said as him and Harry headed to the door. Louis waited until they left before he turned back to me with a sad expression.

" Where's Jordan? " I asked him. I wanted her here too.

" She's not here... " he whispered.

" Obviously. " I said with a mocking tone.

" You know what I mean Zayn. "

" Where is she? "

" She went out of the country. She left a note this morning... " I cringed as he said left a note in the morning. " She went to the states because of her brother's wedding. " I nodded and sighed.

" Okay... " Just then, The doctor walked in along with a crying Harry? And Liam.

" Harry? What's wrong? " Louis asked worriedly. The doctor looked at me as they talked.

" You just have to sign these to get your release forms Mr. Malik. " he handed me a clipboard which I put on my lap and grabbed the pen. I signed my initials and handed back to him. " I'll be right back. "

I laid there waiting, wanting so bad to just go home! Jordan can't stop me this time. The only person I have to worry about is Louis. I have an idea to keep him out though.

The doctor walked back in and I overheard Harry saying that his mum was really sick or something. He handed the release forms to Louis who quickly filled them out and handed them back to the doctor who gave me my clothes.

I stood up and started to change my clothes not bothering that the others were in the room. I started pulling in my pants but was having quite a bit of trouble. Louis walked over and looked at me.

" Do you need help Zayn? " he asked and I nodded. He grabbed the sides of my pants and started to pull them up. He accidentally brushed my crotch in the process causing me to smack him upside the head. " Ow! " he complained after he fully got my pants on.

" Don't touch there! " I said back to him as I slipped my jacket on. I didn't care I didn't have a shirt. I walked passed the other boys and out of the hospital after paying.

" The car is this way Zayn. " Louis stated.

" I want to walk. " I said. I knew my way home from this place because me and Niall always used to walk here and back to see the sick children.

" Alright. I'm going to be at Harry's okay? " I nodded and he left. I started walking and saw the ally way that me and Niall first got mugged. I thought to myself for a minute.

Should I let someone else do the beating or myself?

Someone else.

I started to walked down there and that same guy was still there. I walked passed him until my arm was grabbed and slammed me to the wall before grabbing my crotch almost instantly.

" Hey Sexi. " the Zach guy said. I remembered his name and memorized their voices because they hurt Niall and I was going to give them a living hell.

" Hi. " I said as his gripped tightened on my little no no area. I gasped.

" What happened to blondie? How could he get tired of you? " Zach whispered 'seductively' into my ear.

" We broke.... Up! " my voice cracked as he bit my neck. " Please stop... " I asked him and he seemed to obey.

" What's up Sexy thang? " he asked me hand still on that spot and he was still pretty close.

" I don't want to be raped. I want to be killed so please can you do it for me? " I asked him blankly. His hand fell to his side and he looked at me with a shocked expression.

" What happened to make you want to be killed? " he asked suddenly concerned. I slid down the wall deciding that he wasn't going to kill me. There goes that plan.

" Me and Niall broke up... " I whispered tears already in my eyes.

" I'm sorry bro. Have you tried cutting? "

I lifted my good arm up to pick the arm I couldn't move up and showed him the stitches. He grabbed my arm and examined it.

" How did you get stitches? "

" I was almost dead! Almost... But my best friend Jordan found me and Louis called the ambulance and now I can't move this arm... " I told him with tears falling from my eyes.

" I'm so sorry bro. You need a ride home or something? Company? " I nodded slightly. At least he understood that I wanted to just die.

When we got to my house he helped me into my room. He sat down on my bed as I went over to my desk and pulled out a pen.

Niall,

You remember Zach right? The one who jumped us that one day? Well he's on my bed right now. He helped me get home and into my room because I'm just not myself anymore. I can't even pull my own pants.

I smacked Louis earlier because he managed to touch my crotch. I really don't want to be in this life. You are gone and that just leaves my life completely blank.

I love you Ni and always will. Just please don't forget about me okay?

-Zayn.

" Hey, Uhm... I never did get your name... " I heard Zach say behind me. I turned around after putting the letter in the drawer.

" It's Zayn... " I told him. He nodded and stood up.

" Well I have to go Zayn. Sorry bout earlier by the way... See ya. In another life probably. " he walked out of my room and I laid down on my bed.

What am I supposed to do if Louis and Jordan keep interrupting?