Random Skulduggery Pleasant Nonsense

Dead Men Drunk

This is just a random thing that- I have no Idea. I do not apologize for anything.

POV: Skulduggery

Skulduggery had no idea what he was thinking when he agreed to let Valkyrie throw a party at his house- but he was extremely amused at what was currently happening.

POV: Third Person

As soon as Ravel, Dexter, Saracen, Shudder and Ghastly had arrived, Valkyrie had immediately started a game of truth or dare. With pizza. And achohol. Not going into details, all the people attending the party except for Skulduggery (he couldn't drink) and Shudder (he was to busy shoving pizza into his mouth) ended up drunk. The result was chaos.

"Wiggle, iggle, wiggle, iggle, ploop, ploop yeah!" Valkyrie sung as she jumped off the couch, only to belly-flop onto Shudder, who was lying on the floor groaning, from to much pizza intake. Valkyrie immediately jumped up and started waltzing with Dexter, after he finished somersulting down the stairs.

"Tiggle, iggle, piggle, figgle, miggle, wiggle, biggle, siggle, liggle!" Valkyrie and Dexter repeatedly sung, stepping on each other's feet the whole time. Meanwhile, Saracen sidled up to Skulduggery with Ghastly at his side, believing he didn't know they were there.

"Boo!" shouted Saracen, Ghastly shouting it about four seconds after him, and immediately they started a ringing chorus of "Old Mcdonald had a farm".

As they were doing that, Ravel managed to knock Valkyrie and Dexter over, (they were now collapsed in a heap, moaning about how Ravel was the Emperor of Cupcakes)* see Ali_Cynical, Ravel, Emperor of Cupcakes*, Sit on Shudder, (who rolled over and ran upstairs to heave in the bathroom) and lie down across Skulduggery's lap. Ravel lowered his voice and said:

'This is my most secretest secret Skully.'

Skulduggery rolled his eyes. 

'Yes, you already tried to kill the world Erskine.'

to which Ravel replied:

'No Skullywullypullydullysully- ooh! monsters ink, pen, pencil, paper, school, teacher, learning, words, WORD ASSOCIATION GAMES!' He proceeded to fall of the couch, and mutter to Skulduggery's leg-bone

'No, I'm actually a pretty, shiny, magical mermaid with a lovely hair and colourful voice!' Ravel rolled over, got up, walked a few more steps muttering to himself, fell over the Dexter-Valkyrie heap and started crying about his worthlessness in life.

"No Ravel, your hair is sh t." Skulduggery deadpanned to the sobbing blob on the floor.

As soon as Ravel fell on the pile, Valkyrie jumped up from the bottom, flapping her arms like wings. 

"I am a beautiful butterfly, look at my wings!"

The pile somehow jumped up as one. Dexter gasped, as Ravel's eyes widened in awe. Saracen fell down bowing and Ghastly just fell down. Asleep. Valkyrie ran over to Skulduggery, dislodging his camera, and tugging him out the door- or trying to, because his fingers fell off. As soon as this occurred, Valkyrie picked them up, skipping happily out the door with them, flapping the fingers as well as her own arms. 

POV: Shudder

As soon as I stumbled down the stairs, I saw Ghastly asleep on the floor, Saracen bowing to thin air, Dexter gasping like a fish out of water and Ravel crying in what looked like awe. All while Skulduggery chased Valkyrie out the door with her flapping her arms and holding... Skulduggery's fingers? I decided to leave them be, and stumbled back up the stairs. 

POV: Skulduggery

As I chased Valkyrie out the door, I saw Shudder stumble down the stairs, take on look around and run back up. He then promptly collapsed and began to snore. As soon as I looked back around for Valkyrie, I tripped over something.

POV: Third person

Skulduggery grimaced as he bent down to pick up his fingers (that he just tripped over) which was quite a feat, because, well they were his fingers. He looked around to see Valkyrie had fallen asleep. So had Ravel- sobbing even though he was asleep. As he watched, Dexter and Saracen wobbled over to each other singing 'old country road' as they fell on top of each other, asleep. A sudden, invisible wave swept over the room. Skulduggery began to float in the air. Meditating.

Everyone was asleep. And then...

They were asleep. the end!

Sooooo. I don't know. finish it in your imagination if you weren't satisfied with the ending. That was surprisingly fun to write. Byeee!!!!