Random Stuff With The ASEAN

Timor bday

I'm not late this time huehueh..

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Indonesia: Hey Timor! I made some Mie panjang umur for you.

Timor: A what.

Indonesia: It's noodles. China used to give them to me every chinese new year. He said if you eat them every chinese new year, you'll live long.

Timor: No wonder that old man is still alive.

Indonesia: Timor. We're fricking country personifications. We live as long as our countries.

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Student Timor: Ugh. Why do we have to learn maths.

Student PNG: To reach our dreams and prepare yourself for the future or something like that.

Student Timor: Bold of you to assume I have a future.

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Timor: Do short people say "I'll be with you shortly" or "I'll be with you as I am"?

Cambodia: I don't know. What do you usually say?

Timor: I usually say "I'll be in your room tonight and kill you in your sleep"

Cambodia: Alright, Salty Kid.

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Malaysia: Timor, please get out of your room. It's been TWO WEEKS.

Timor: No.

Malaysia: Come on, Timor. You're gonna starve.

Timor: Singa sent me to my room and said I shouldn't come out until I reflect on what I did.

Malaysia: What exactly did you do?

Timor: I punched him in the face because he's annoying and I regret nothing.

Malaysia: I'm so proud of you...

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Timor & Laos: *chilling in the meeting room*

Timor: *sudden random thought*

Timor: What if the scenarios in our head are like what happened in our AU?

Laos: Well, alternate universe me must be thinking of a really bad scenario right now.

Timor: If I just keep thinking of  bad scenarios,  alternate universe me will experience it then we might be able to compromise and think of better scenarios.

Laos: wait what if our AU self was thinking of a lewd scenario.

Timor: oh.

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Philippines: Viet, did the chicken came first or was it the egg?

Vietnam: Uuh.. The egg probably idk.

Philippines: Okay. But if the egg comes first. Where does it come from? A chicken has to lay the egg.

Vietnam: Then, the chicken comes first.

Philippines: Yeah, but chickens come from eggs!

Timor: I say the chicken comes first. The egg comes after.

Timor: I'm talking about cocks and ovaries. God created Adam before Eve.

(Aight. For those of you who don't understand. According to some religions, god created the first human called Adam and then created a wife for him called Eve. So man first, then woman)

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Timor: *sleeping in her room*

Singapore: Timor, can you please help me for a moment?

Timor: *wakes up* Ugh... What does that guy needs now? I'm going back to sleep *sleeps again*

Singapore: Timor! *walks in her room* Tch. Such a lazy kid.

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Timor: Myan, why don't you use metric system?

Myanmar: I do. I also use imperial system tho. I'm just inconsistently using both of them :/

Timor: Okay, but why don't America use the metric system?

Myanmar: Foot fetish probably. Idk.

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*ASEAN zoom meeting (observers included)*

Thailand: Man, I hate staying at home and doing work, ana~

Brunei: Right? I mean, this thing feels so unreal that it might be the government pranking us.

Timor: Actually, I believe that it's some sort of alliance between the hand sanitizer, mask, and zoom industry. They paid people to pretend to get the virus and the media also got got paid.

ASEAN:

Timor: Am I rig- *disconnected*

Philippines: Holy shit! Do you think zoom banned her for figuring out their secret?

Vietnam: Don't be silly. Her internet is probably not stable.

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Timor: To be honest, I don't know how to feel about being 13 in human age. What do I do now?

Brunei: Aww, Timor is grown up now.

Timor: No, I'm not. It's not like I'm old enough to have my first kiss.

Brunei: Well, all I can say is just save your first kiss for your partner in the future. Even though, I don't think we'll have one.

Timor: I think kissing is weird cuz you show your romantic attraction to someone by making your eating holes touch each other.

France: *barges in* NON! KISSING IS A WONDERFUL WAY TO EXPRESS LOVE~

Timor: Wasn't talking to you, my dude.

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Timor: *listening to spotify*

Spotify ad: Hi

Timor: Not you, again.

Spotify ad: Would you like spotify premium? It's reeeaaalllyyy nice. You're annoyed with this ad right? Buy premium.

Timor: I don't want to.

Spotify ad: Also, there's this guy called Peter who broke a world record for the most rope skipping in one minute. You'd like to skip ads too right?

Timor: What does rope skipping has to do with skipping ads?

Spotify ad: Buy premium. Do it for Peter.

Timor: I don't even know who Peter is.