My Own Songs

Why!? How!?

God I know you're listening,
For I know you're the real deal.
I believe you are mostly amazing,
But even so my lips ain't sealed.
I've seen and heard of your flaws,
And I've experienced your tests of faith.
I've known all about your cause,
But I think you're executing it the wrong way.
/I've been depressed since 4th grade,
But always talked and prayed to you,
Hoping you can make my demons fade.
Yet I feel like I'm being stepped on by your shoe,
And I feel as if the weight has gotten even heavier.
Sometimes you make me wander around in circles,
Questioning why are you not making life easier,
And questioning how can you let a kid get so many burns?/
Alright, I know you want everybody to believe,
But your way of getting some of them to is wrong.
I mean come on God, they're kids who wanna live!
Not get bullied, degraded, and abused in order to find you!
You give us free will and basically criticize it,
I mean, you give permission to the devil to test us!
What on Earth, you just made half of us quit!
You know how cunning the devil is!
/Why do you do what you do?
How do you do what you do?
Those are the questions I have,
And I just can't come up with the answers.
You say you love us yet put us through fires,
Why do I deserve to go through this?
I was just a kid God, why!? How!?
And there are so many others with this hell!/
In your book it says you go to hell for suicide,
And guess who pays that price nowadays?
There are kids committing suicide like a riptide!
And you're telling me you'd punish them that way?
You'd punish what you call pure innocence?
Those kids weren't weak either, not in the slightest,
For you just upped the standard expectations.
9 years old God! You almost drowned me in darkness!
I was born into a Christian family,
But there are others who didn't even know you,
Yet you punish them for trying to end their own suffering.
I love you big guy, but at the same time I hate you and your ideas.
/Why would you do this to a kid?
How could you drown the kid in darkness?
God, why!? How!?
Most don't know of you yet you do this!?
And this is only the tip of the iceberg of your flaws.
I know of your wrath, but this is not a just cause.
You should punish the evil in people,
Yet you punish kids who knew nothing of the word!
You won't let those pained souls into your heavenly temple,
But you'll let those who seek forgiveness from your sword.
Why!? How!? I'm positive you can't tell me, but I'll still ask.
Why God!? How can you!?/