Bite My Tongue (Oli Sykes Fan Fiction)

Throw Me to the Flames

Kitty was talking to me about some girl that he met at a bar during a show they played a while back, since I was still sitting in the bus, in the exact same spot, waiting for Oliver. It's been about an hour now, which wasn't too long but to me it felt like eternity. All I wanted was to see him, and see that he was at the very least, alive. It was making it difficult to pay attention to the details about this girls chest, not that I cared much to know the details anyway.

It was when Kitty was telling me how he got the girls number when I saw a tall figure walk into the bigger area of the bus. 

It was Oliver. As soon as he looked up, he saw me and we locked eyes. His face looked hollow, he looked like he hadn't slept in years when he just woke up moments ago. His eyes were darker, his skin was dry and he looked so sad. He looked like a piece of him was missing and I wanted to know what it was so that I could give it back to him and he could be the Oliver that I loved so much.

"Anne." He barely even whispered my name but before I could say anything to him or even think of a reply, he ran towards me, picked me up off of the couch and crushed me into a hug. 

He held me so tight, I thought that he would never let me go and for a moment I was okay with that. I was okay with just being here contently, knowing that he was with me and not on the other side of the world. I was okay with it for a minute, but then I remember why I stayed to see him in the first place. I remembered what I needed to confront him about.

I pulled away but he still held my arms and stared at me. It was like he was seeing a ghost, like I came back from the dead. I'm sure I didn't look much different though, I was amazed at how different he looked. His hair was longer, he was thinner and he looked sick. He had more tattoos if that was even possible, but you could tell there were more. He felt thinner and sicker and it made me want to throw up because this wasn't like him. And it made me want to cry because I knew exactly why he was like this.

"Oliver, we have to talk." I said quietly. 

I noticed Kitty get up out of the corner of my eye and walk back toward the bunks. He knew that I was going to try to talk to Oliver about his drug abuse and he probably didn't want to be anywhere near this conversation and I don't blame him at all.

"I know. I know, I am so, so, sorry that I never called you or answered you. I can explain everything later I'm just so happy that you're back." He was practically gushing and I had to admit that it was adorable. 

I could see how sincere he was, how much he really did miss me. I wanted to tell him that it was okay and we could get over it but I knew that there were bigger issues than our lack of communication right now. I couldn't stall, I had to tell him. I had to talk to him and tell him that I knew what was wrong and that he needed to stop.

"Oliver, no, I'm not worried about that right now. We have some serious things to talk about. Sit down." I said sternly. 

He would probably consider this what he called my manager voice. He used to say that there was a different side of me when I was managing and when I was relaxed and sometimes they got mixed up. I think it was because there was no difference at all, both sides are part of me;I'm still just one person.

Oliver sat down on the little couch, and he sat to my right, facing me. He looked worried, and I wanted to tell him not to worry but he probably should be. He should be worried about his well being, he should be worried about how this is affecting the people around him and the people who love and care about him. I don't think that's what he was worried about though. It looked like he was afraid I was going to tell him I hate him or I never wanted to see him again, which is something I would fear if I was in his position. It's something that I actually did fear before stepping onto this bus, but that wasn't the problem anymore. He was practically killing himself and there was something that needed to be done about it.