Bite My Tongue (Oli Sykes Fan Fiction)

Heart Attacks Waiting to Happen

The show ended rather quickly and all the guys piled into the van silently. No one really wanted to bring up what just happened in the green room, and I think everyone was still trying to let it sink in. That or they didn't want to bother me. They were so silent I had no way of knowing what they were thinking. We drove straight through for a few hours before stopping at a hotel somewhere in New Jersey. The guys filed back out of the van, and we checked in two rooms. The way it was split up, I was going to be in a room with Jordan and Oliver, and Lee would be sharing a room with the Matts.

The guys went up to the rooms first and I stayed outside for a minute to lock up the van and trailer and make sure that everything was okay before heading inside. It also helped to have another moment alone, and I knew that spending the night in the same room as Oliver would be pretty awkward tonight. I walked all the way up to my room and Jordan was already asleep on his bed or at least close enough that me walking in made no difference. Oliver, on the other hand, was wide awake.

"Well that didn't take long, did it?" I said to Oliver, gesturing to the motionless Jordan on the other bed, trying to come off lightly to fix the eerie mood we were all stuck in. I understood that it was unexpected but I didn't think that the fight was really anything to be that spooked about. It would be forgotten about by tomorrow most likely.

"Why don't we go get food? Or just get out of here for a little bit. I think you and I both need it." He asked. 

He kind of jumped right into it when he spoke, like he was nervous about asking before he actually said it out loud. Similar to the way a middle school boy talks to his first real crush, or a teenage girl blurts out something random in front of a boy that she thinks is cute.

I just nodded and let Oliver lead the way out of the hotel. We found a 24 hour diner about a block or so away from the small town hotel and since it was two in the morning it seemed like that was really our only option. We headed inside and found ourselves a booth in the back even though there were only two other tables being used and one of them was a waitress eating by herself.

I sat across from Oliver and decided to take initiative and start the conversation, "So, we're going to be staying in Pennsylvania until at least new years. The last show is December 16th which is tomorrow. You'll be staying out in Pittsburgh where the studio is but I'll be going home once the tour is over." I explained. 

I didn't look at him too much, I kind just played with my nails, chipping off the dark brown nail polish that needed to be redone anyway. I figured talking about the tour would be the safest thing, this way we could avoid anything about the fight. I don't think either of us wanted to talk about it.

"Going home? I thought you lived in Pennsylvania?" He said curiously. It was then that I remembered that Oliver was from England and had no idea where most things in America were. His confusion was pretty cute.

"I do, but I live in Philadelphia. PA is a pretty big state, and Philly is about five hours from Pittsburgh. But Phil lives out there and I'll probably be around a lot since I'ma bit of a free lance handy man around the studio. I'm kind of working my way into the business of recording and producing instead of just being an audio tech at a venue, ya know?" I explained since I don't think any of the guys really knew what I did before being a manager, or what I would be doing when I wasn't a manager.

"So, if you're gonna stay in Philly, what happens to us?" He asked nervously. 

I froze in place, not sure that I was really hearing what he just said. Did I hear that right? Does Oliver really think that we were an us? Did he want there to be an us. Everything was kind of spinning and I don't know why I was so nervous about, he was just a boy. Even though he was just a boy he was also a boy that I had grown feelings for and learned to really care about. I was hoping that he really did want there to be an us.

"I, uh, didn't know that there was an us." I stuttered out nervously. I didn't want him to think I didn't want it, but I didn't want to come across too desperate and willing to be with him.

Did I even want to be with him? Yeah, I have feelings for him and I like being with him a lot but did I really want to be in a relationship with him? Would we even last? Would it work with all the distance? And say we get past the whole Pittsburgh thing, what about when he goes back to England or back on tour and I'm stuck in Philadelphia? I didn't want to start getting ahead of myself but I wanted to be prepared. I wasn't even sure he meant anything about a relationship but what if he did? I really wanted to be with him, though...

After my thirty second terror in my head, Oliver finally answered, "I would like there to be an us," I could tell that there was more that he had to say so I stayed quiet and let him continue, "so you should be my girlfriend."

He was smiling wide and happy but I could see the slight nerves behind it. He looked hopeful but scared and he sounded confident. He knew that this was what he wanted. He didn't exactly ask me to be his girlfriend, he just suggested it. And despite all my nerves a few seconds ago, I was confident, too. I knew for sure now, I wanted to be with Oliver. But I wasn't going to let that faze my cool and collected persona that I had hopefully been keeping up.

"Be your girlfriend? Is that an official question?" I tried to be playful, and make this more of a fun moment, because that's the kind of relationship I wanted to have with Oliver and there was a better chance of that happening if I started it off that way. I also hated serious moments.

"Just say yes." he said back, playfully as well. I couldn't really hide my smile after that, so I just nodded in response. I was extremely happy that we could both get through the awkward not knowing stage and just be together, honestly. We were finally together and even though I had a lot of fear, none of it mattered right now.

Oliver leaned over the table and kissed me lightly, then we just went back to having a casual conversation about random things before leaving and heading back to the hotel. And I was able to sleep well because I finally went to bed nearly stress free and happy. I could lay in the same bed as him without it being awkward. I felt like nothing could hurt me for the first time in along time. Because I was now Oliver's girlfriend, and I hoped that this feeling would never go away.