Disconnected | Michael Clifford

sixteen - Felicity

Michael knew. Michael found out. Michael knew and he was pissed. Felicity was still processing the anger that Michael radiated only ten minutes previous when she walked into someone.

 "Look where you're going!" A male voice snapped. "Stupid little bitch."

"Fuck you mate, I'm not in the mood." She replied, glaring up at the man. Admittedly, giving attitude to a man who had what must've been the buffest female in all of England on his arm, wasn't a wise idea but it seemed as if lately, Felicity was full of unwise ideas.

"Don't you talk to me like that." He growled, stepping closer but his female companion pulled him back and stepped closer to Felicity herself. At first, Felicity thought that was it, she was going to gain her first ever pummeling but, nothing happened. No punching. No kicking. Not even a slap. The woman, she gave a sympathetic look to the young girl.

"I'm sorry about him." She spoke softly, shocking the bassist but not the rude man. "Are you okay, sweetie? You look like you've seen better days."

"I have." Felicity sighed and ran her fingers through her hair. "I'm sorry I snapped like that, I'm not usually one to do those things."

"Would you like to get a coffee and talk about it?"

"No offence but I'm not into the whole grabbing a cuppa with someone I just walked into, thing."

"That's understandable." The woman smiled. "We'll let you get on your way but I really do hope things turn around for you."

"Me too." Felicity gave a half hearted attempt at a smile towards the woman before walking off, trying not to dwell on how weird the day was going.

Feeling her phone vibrate in her pocket, she pulled it out, spotting Calum's face bright on her screen, alerting her that he was calling her but she didn't want to talk to him. Even though she knew Calum wasn't the one that said anything, she had more trust in him than that, she didn't want to risk saying the wrong thing to him. So, she turned off her phone and stepped into her home.

"Anyone in?!" She called but gained no response. She had hoped someone was home, that someone was around to distract her but there was no-one. She was left in the silence with nothing but her thoughts for company and that can never end well.

***

"I think I'm going to get arrested." Felicity slurred as she fell into Eddie's office. It was 10am and she was still drunk from the day before. It was almost a 24 hour drinking spree for the girl and she wasn't even sure how she hadn't passed out yet.

"What the fuck?" Eddie jumped up from his chair and ran over to the giggling drunken mess of a girl on the floor to help her up and into the arm chair by the door. "Why are you going to get arrested?"

"I don't know. There's police downstairs." She whispered. "They were watching me. Did I do something wrong?"

"I don't know, did you?"

"I don't know, did I?"

"Why're you drunk, it's not even midday and you don't like alcohol."

"I don't like Michael either right now." She grumbled slumping down and running her hands over her face, a moment of sobriety settling in her mind long enough to remember why she bought that first vodka shot in the first place. "He knows, he knows about us. He got mad. He yelled at me. He fucking hates me." Felicity stared up at Eddie then, not giving him a moment to react before allowing tears to finally spill down her cheeks, the one thing she had been trying to prevent. "I don't want to cry over him Eddie but he fucking hates me." She sobbed.

"I'm sure he doesn't, if anything, he hates me, Felicity, I doubt he could ever hate you." He soothed pulling the green haired girl into his arms.

"He does. I could see it in his eyes. He'll never want to see me again, Eddie. I ccan't- he's not- I can't handle this, Eddie." She gripped at his shirt, neither of them caring that she was creasing the expensive fabric and staining it with mascara. "He fucking hates me. I hate me too."

"Don't talk like that."

"I need him."

"No, you don't."

"I fucking do!" Felicity suddenly pushed the man away and got up, almost falling straight back down but caught herself against the wall. "I fucking need him. I've been a fucking wreck without him and I thought that for a moment, we were good. I thought we were going to get back together and everything will be how it should be but it's not! Everything is fucked up and I don't want to have this life without him."

"You're being dramatic."

"Yeah, probably but I really fucking need him. How am I supposed to play music, tour the world when everywhere I turn there's his stupid fucking face staring back at me? He's like a shadow I can't escape but without him, I wouldn't be the same." Felicity wiped at her eyes harshly, glad she had calmed down slightly, all thanks to the alcohol enduced numbness returning. "I don't know what to do. I wish I could forget him but I can't." 

"I'm going to cancel everything I have today and take you home. I think what you need is to sober up."

"No, I need more alcohol so I can forget all of this." She scoffed, pushing away from teh wall and stumbling out of the room.

"Felicity!" Eddie called following her. "You can't do this to yourself. You're going to wind up in the hospital."

"Don't give a fuck." She waved her hand carelessly in what she thought was his general direction.

"Eddie, there you are!" The main receptionist for the entire building exclaimed stepping out of the elevator. "I've been calling your office."

"I'm kind of busy right now, Theresa." He replied politely.

"But it's important."

"I'm sure they can wait."

"You want me to tell the police to wait?" Finally, Eddie gave the woman his full attention, giving Felicity the chance to get into the elevator and the doors to close.

Blank eyes staring forward, Felicity left the building, trying to focus on appearing sober instead of thinking of Michael and how much she felt he was ruining her life, even if she was the one that fucked up in the first place. But as far as she was concerned, she never wanted to have feelings for him, especially not as strong as they were. Even then when her head was swimming with incoherant thoughts, Michael still took centre stage, standing tall and taking up most of her focus away from one foot in front of the other.

Even as she fell, even as her hands failed to catch her, even as her head hit the ground and the blurred pain spread through her body, even as she rolled onto her back, blood slowly trickling down her head, Michael's face still floated in front of her, disappointment strong on his features as he stared down at her but at least he was looking at her.

~~

sorry it took forever to put this chapter up, truth be told, it's been finished for ages I just hadn't noticed it wasn't up as I've actually never been on the account before but hey, better late than never, apparently

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