imagine: felix passes away and you're currently at his funeral, saying your goodbyes.
lee felix's pov
there she stood, beside me. tears in her eyes, a piece of paper in her hand. hundreds of people sat in their seats, their faces masked with a smile, fake. she tried to begin her words, her voice always sounded sweet, but, instead, she brushed her finger along her under eye, capturing the watery substance from falling down her cheek. she took one look at the piece of paper she held in front of her before scrunching it up in her palm, linking her fingers as she held them out before her.
the water in her eyes darkened the colour of her orbs, a pale blue turning dark as the tears filled her eyes, heightening to its peak before a single blink provoked it to fall, streaming down her light skinned cheek, she stood silent, very silent.
"i had an entire speech prepared," she giggled tearily, "but it doesn't explain how i feel..it explains what i want everyone to think i feel." her head hung low, her dress caught in the flow of the wind. "everything i ever wanted was here, right in my arms." a smile lit up her face, the crowd of people following her expression, their smiles hiding their grief. "and, in what felt like a second, it was all gone. every bit of it."
sniffles, as well as sobs, filled the building, the one room building. the different sounds echoed, surrounding the walls as they bounced off of one another.
"i tried hard, to give him everything. to make him want to spend every moment he can with a smile on his face, and i'm still trying to." she cried, sobs leaving her lips as the tears continued to fall, "the first time i saw him, the very first time, lights just...surrounded him. bright white lights, a captivating view from afar, and i knew he'd change everything for me." her tongue rested on the inside of her cheek as she bit down on it, struggling to find words. "we had so many plans, plans to change everything. who we were, and who we wanted to become. i feel most guilty for saying i'd love him until the day he dies, because i didn't think it would be this soon... so, right now, i'd feel most grateful if i can rephrase my previous words." she smiled, turning to me. "lee felix, i will love you for eternity...your death will never change my love for you." the sound of her heartbeat changed within a second, a steady pace repeated until turning to me, where her heart then began to...break. tiny fragments deepening into an abyss, an empty abyss.
"i promised you i'd stay...and my promise will remain, for as long as eternity." light shone down on my casket, the flowers above my coffin started to sparkle in the light, shimmers of the stained glass windows of the church began to pattern onto the dark black case.
throughout the entire funeral, i stood by her side, holding her hand, whispering in her ear that i'm okay. i made a promise to myself before my life came to an end; i'd keep her safe for all eternity, and i would never come to even thinking of breaking that promise. at the toughest times, when she needed me most, i would always be with her, sat beside her, singing to her. whether she could hear me or not, i would still sing.
she placed a kiss on the rose she held in her other hand, dropping it gently onto my casket, brushing her fingers over the case, "i love you...so much." she cried.
her body pivoted toward the sounds of cries around the church, the entire room full with bodies dressed in black; white shirts and black trousers, black dresses and black shoes.
her head turned toward my friends hundled in a bunch; chan, woojin, minho, changbin, seungmin, jisung, jeongin and hyunjin... their smiles faded as she made eye contact, they knew how much she was hurting, they hurt, too.
she raised her hand, gesturing it into a shaka sign (thumb out and pinkie out), she rotated her hand as she smiled, "aussie..." a sad smile formed across her cheeks, the boys' faces lighting up at the memory.
they, too, raised their hand as they gestured an aussie sign, repeating her words.
"aussie." they smiled, speaking in formation.
