imagine: felix has a dream of his worst fear, scared that it would become a reality.
felix's pov
"i don't want to talk to you right now."
you completely brushed me off, and i didn't understand why.
"y/n... talk to me." i whimpered, sniffling through my tears. "please, baby..."
i walked over to you, holding my hand over your shoulder before you tugged it away, "seriously, get away from me."
"tell me what i did wrong..."
you shook your head, biting your lower lip hesitantly, "that's the thing... you didn't do anything."
"did...something happen? something i don't know about?"
"felix, there are a lot of things that have happened that you don't know about." you sighed, pinching the bridge of your nose.
you were annoyed at me, but you didn't say why. you'd hardly spoken to me all day, you didn't let me hug you, you didn't even let me look at you for more than a few seconds.
"so tell me what's wrong. you always tell me. what's different this time? you're so distant with me."
"oh, i'm distant?! the only one who seems to be close to me right now is someone who isn't you."
"please just speak to me."
"what am i doing right now? i'm speaking to you. i'm letting you speak to me. say what you need to say before i go."
my eyes teared up again instantly, "...go? y-you're g-going?"
i began to stutter.
"well, i'm not staying here."
"do you hate me that much...?" i sobbed, using my sweater paw to wipe away my tears.
you stood silent and still for what seemed like an eternity, but you turned your head to face me, your eyes watery and your teeth chewing on your bottom lip. "i do." you glanced up to the ceiling, your eyes wet with tears, "i hate you so much. i hate you more than it's even possible. did it ever occur to you that i never wanted this to begin with? that i never wanted you? are you that dumb? that stupid? how could you think i'd want to be with you? how could someone ever love someone like you?"
the tears rolled down my cheek as i studied your face... you didn't mean what you said. i know you didn't.
"why're you s-saying this-"
"because! i...i don't feel anything anymore. in fact, i never have."
"what, so, these past three years have meant...nothing? absolutely nothing to you?"
"these past few years have meant fuck all to me. if anything, you were a waste of fucking time, felix." you cried into your sweater, brushing your hair out of your face.
"you don't mean it. i know you don't."
as much as i wanted to believe you didn't mean it, and as obvious as it was that you didn't mean it... you wouldn't let me believe it.
"you know i love you so much, y/n-"
"yeah? well, i don't love you."
"yes, you do. i know you do!"
"felix! why can't you just learn to let the fuck go?! seriously! i don't want you. you mean nothing to me! get that in your goddamn head, jesus!" you snapped, your eyes crying waterfalls.
you unclipped the necklace i gave you, walking over to me and dropping it in my hand.
"give it to someone who gives a shit. never speak to me again."
"y/n..."
"y/n..." i lifted my head from the pillow, trying to catch my breath as i held my hand over my chest, my body sweaty and my face covered in tears.
"felix, baby, are you okay?" you sat up from the bed, brushing your fingers through my hair.
i let out a sigh of relief, gripping onto you tightly and nuzzling my face into your neck.
"felix, what's wrong?" you kissed my forehead, holding me close to your body as you held the quilt over us both.
"don't leave me...ever." i cried into you.
"baby..." you lifted my head, your eyes meeting mine, "...i love you. so much."
"i love you, y/n."
that was it. that was my worst fear.
