Disordered Eating (Skephalo)

The Boy Holding Me

Darryl's POV

I opened my eyes and I was outside. It was a late night and I was walking Rat, but Rat wasn't there. I was just holding onto Rat's leash. My dog was not attached to it.

It was night, but the world felt so much darker. The streetlights flickered as I walked down the road. There was not a single car or person on the road with me. I felt very uneasy as I kept walking.

Where did I come from? Why did I just bring Rat's leash?

I knew the direction I was going in was towards home. I couldn't remember how long I've been walking or what I did before. My head was pounding which made me feel like I had a migraine. My stomach felt upset and I felt so tired.

I kept walking in basically autopilot to my own place, still feeling very confused. I thought I was at home with-

I looked up and realized I was on the bridge.

Zak was standing on the edge of the bridge again, his back towards me. I couldn't scream or run like I did before, but I let out my loudest whisper.

"Zak!!! Please get down from there," I said with tears falling down my face.

"Too late Darryl. You couldn't save me. This is all your fault," he said with a sinister laugh.

"Zak please don't leave me. I-I need you. Zak! Zak," I broke out into ugly sobs that made my chest hurt and vision blur.

"Too late Darryl."

Zak walked off the edge and I screamed, although nothing came out. Zak kept falling down the bridge and I screamed and sobbed. I couldn't help him. I couldn't-

Before he hit the ground I opened my eyes.

Tears streamed down my face as I jolted awake. I was on the couch where me and Zak slept. I, in a frenzy, looked over to my side to see that Zak wasn't there snoring.

"No!!!" I screamed and cried.

Where is Zak? He was supposed to be sleeping there. Did he sneak out at night? Why did he leave? I failed to watch him. I failed. I failed. I failed.

"ZAK!!!" I yelled in pain, hoping for him to answer. I buried my face into my hands and cried. I couldn't believe I failed that muffin.

Suddenly, I felt arms wrapped tight around me. I looked up from my tears to see Zak holding on to me.

"What's wrong, Bad?" He asked me and held me tighter.

"I had a nightmare where.. where you jumped off and I couldnt stop you. I couldn't scream or run to you. I begged for you to not leave me, but you told me it was too late and you walked off. Then... then I woke up and you weren't here." I cried into his chest.

"I was taking a shower. I'm sorry."

"No it's okay. I'm just glad you're here," I said.

"Before I met you on that bridge, I never knew anyone actually cared for me. You're such a good person, Darryl," He said and he gave me a slight squeeze in our hugging position.

My heart felt a zap with the squeeze and the room became swirling with colors. I gasped out loud from the effect that Zak gave me to my heart and stomach. I immediately after felt embarassed for gasping.

"Oh! I'm sorry. I didn't know I could squeeze that tightly. I'm not very strong. I'm sorry."

"No Zak it wasnt that it was- well. I just was suprised that's all," I whispered in a shy way.

He started to pull away.

"Don't!"

Zak looked up at me confused and stopped pulling away from me. He looked into my eyes with his that hinted out confusing. I started feeling even more embarrassed and panicked.

"Uhhh I'm sorry. That was. I don't know. Sorry. I just.. I just haven't been hugged anything like that and it felt.. well it felt..." I stopped talking and looked down.

"It's okay Darryl," He said and got even closer to me.

I swear my cheeks were bright red and pink like roses. Even my ears felt like they were burning. Zak was luckily not looking at my face, but when he would pull away again, he would see.

My breathing felt a little heavy, but I tried to hide it. My knees felt shaky and like jello. It was like I was melting into his arms.

No way can I be falling in love with a guy I just met.

That was crazy.

That was illogical.

That's not love?

However, my heart didn't stop being erupted into fireworks and my knees did not stop being jello. My breathing didn't go back to normal and my stomach didn't stop being upset. No amount of logic took away what was going on in my mind.

Did I love him?

I don't know.

However, I knew from now on I needed him here on this Earth with me.