•°—"He betrayed me again. Why do I keep letting him delude me?"—°•
My hand fell from holding the hem of his shirt, I could never trust him anymore and I can’t look at him anymore. I don’t even know if it’s still him, the man from yesterday who was very considerate of me that day, or maybe it’s the old boy from before who had those worst anger issues that could literally kill you if you dared to look in his way.
I don’t really know what to feel or what I should feel at this moment. Do I cry or do I scream in anger? Be terrified or be sad? Be hurt or feel happy because at some point I overcame a devil that showed me their real colour which I really hope could knock out some senses on my head to stop being delusional and stupid. But i forgot, i never totally overcame his manipulation, i can’t even move on from him. Where on earth did I get the audacity to say that I overcame a devil.
I don’t know what I am supposed to do either. I was just burned out and numb, my mind was flying over to the other universe trying to find an answer. What the heck is going to happen to me after this reckless sht?
The two douchebags started conversing, I couldn’t comprehend any words they’re talking about. The only thing that was on my mind was to run. My legs started to move backwards slowly trying not to let any of the two notice until I finally had the courage to run away.
I turned my back on them and ran as fast as I could. I thought I had already gone so far but I didn’t actually get away from them.
BANGG!!
My right leg got stuck and I couldn't move it. It started throbbing so hard and aching. I feel like dying.
Blood dripped from the back of my right leg and the strong impact of the bullet struck inside of my flesh.
“ARGHHHHH!” I screamed on top of my lungs. I fell on my knees until I was completely injured on the ground. Screaming and finally crying, trying to ease out the pain of my wounded leg and wounded mentality. “It hurts… it hurts so much..” I whisper cried.
I hugged my knees trying to fight the agonizing pain I felt. I couldn’t think straight. All I could think about is to relieve that stinging sensation cut on my leg which is fcking my mind so bad.
I didn’t try to look up and know who shot me, I already knew it for sure. His big and heavy presence is taking over the atmosphere, there’s no doubt that it isn’t him who did it.
“Why?..” I whispered as I whimpered for another sob.
“Don’t you still get it, Yuri?” the voice of that devil finally spoke. He started to take a step forward while I tried my best to avoid his gaze. “This is a game of manipulation and you already lost so long ago”
I sobbed so loud as my wound ached much harder. There weren't even any tears left to cry but I couldn’t stop myself. I just wanted to cry everything out, hoping that it’ll feel better after.
“Stop your pathetic crying. it’s not as if you hadn’t seen this coming.” he stated as he continued to walk closer to me.
“Stay away.” I said.
“Don’t tell me you really thought I was being true?” yes. He started giggling then laughing maniacally. I can’t even describe him anymore, all I could see was a full desperate devil who can’t wait to break me more. “None of it was true, so don’t be delusional. It was a play pretend to get back my girl, you’re just a mere tool to me and it’s so amusing that you were so fooled to even see that.”
It’s so hard to accept the bitter truth, even though I had already thought of this coming— I wasn't fully prepared to face it.
The way he mentioned those words “i need you” to my ears or those words from yesterday “Even if i have to live for a thousand years, I’ll do so just to make you stay.” that just completely manipulated me and convinced me that he was honest, it’s so hard for me to accept this. I had forgiven him a thousand times just because of those simple words and meaningful acts that he did to me. I turned my back to the freedom I could've had— the second he came back crying to me, and this is all I got in the end. I have no idea how to describe it.
