Existence

16. run

"what's reality with all these questions? feels like I missed my alarm and slept in. broken legs, but i chase perfection. these walls are my blank expression. my mind is a home i'm trapped in, and it's lonely inside this mansion." - NF 

Her eyes fluttered open and she half expected to see the dimly lit mansion furnished with mahogany wood. Much to her dismay, she saw quite the opposite. The bright colors of the room blinded her, but she forced her eyes to stay open. 

All she saw was white. 

"I made it.... to heaven?" She asked herself out loud. Its not like there was was anyone there to answer her. She tried to sit up, only to notice her wrists have been restrained to the bed, "Okay, this can't be heaven."

"You're right Mandy, this isn't heaven." A voice said from somewhere in the room. Naturally, she turned her neck in the direction of the sound, facing a man who was also wearing white. His voice awoke a memory in her, one that has been suppressed for far too long. Yet, she couldn't really pinpoint which one it was, or where it came from.

"Oh shit."

"It's good to have you back Mandy," He said with a smile that was probably meant to comfort her, but didn't quite have the desired effect, "Do you know who I am?"

"Can you please tell me why I am tied to the bed? Like I'm all for kink, but you're not really my type," She struggled against the restraints, before giving up and adding, "No offense."

"Are you comfortable? Would you like me to adjust the bed?"

"Oh, so we are just avoiding each other's questions now." She gave him a flat look, sarcasm dripping off her words. 

"You started it." He smirked, "But if you must know, I am a friend."

"Sure you are." She rolled her eyes, "But yeah, can I like, sit up? Looking at you sideways isn't really jogging my memory."

"Of course." He walked over to her and adjusted the bed into a sitting position. 

"So, if we're friends, why the hell am I tied up?" 

"You've been through a lot," He said while pulling a chair out and sitting directly in front of her, "I can loosen the restraints if you're uncomfortable."

"Just tell me what I am doing here." Her reply was curt, a glare forming in her eyes. 

"Well let me introduce myself," He brought he crossed his legs and rested his clip board on his lap, "My name is Dr. James. I am your psychiatrist, you have been in the psych ward-"

"Oh well I expected that." Her shoulders shrugged, as she tried to conceal her laugh.

"For the last year." He finished. 

"Well I didn't expect that."

"You always accept news so easily," His eyebrows furrowed in concern, "Why don't you ask for proof?"

"Yeah, I should probably see the proof." She admitted nonchalantly. 

He took out a paper and showed her. It was a record, nothing serious. It just showed her the day she was admitted. But that was enough for the memories to come flooding back. 

It was the month she tried to kill herself.

"Wait-"

"I know this a lot to take in, but you have been showing immense progress. It was time to tell you the truth."